大家帮我看看这篇英语作文，请指出哪里有错，哪些句子需要改进，哪些句子可以完善，怎样把这篇作文分提高
大家帮我看看这篇英语作文，请指出哪里有错，哪些句子需要改进，哪些句子可以完善，怎样把这篇作文分提高TherearealotofpersonsIadmire.Butthep...
大家帮我看看这篇英语作文，请指出哪里有错，哪些句子需要改进，哪些句子可以完善，怎样把这篇作文分提高There are a lot of persons I admire. But the person I admire most is my mother, I believe my mother is the greatest person in the word.
My mother is a person who is not afraid of difficulty. My family is not rich so my mother gets up early to make money every day. She is a female of great will.
My mother is also an honest female, who always keeps her promises. On one occasion, my mother promised her neighbor to help him purchase something. My mother kept remembering this and completed it on time. Thus I admire my mother.
I believe my mother is a great person, I most honour my mother. 展开
My mother is a person who is not afraid of difficulty. My family is not rich so my mother gets up early to make money every day. She is a female of great will.
My mother is also an honest female, who always keeps her promises. On one occasion, my mother promised her neighbor to help him purchase something. My mother kept remembering this and completed it on time. Thus I admire my mother.
I believe my mother is a great person, I most honour my mother. 展开
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I have a lot of admiration. But I think the most admirable people, or my mother, I also believe that my mother is the greatest person in the world.
First of all, my mother is a kind man. She is kind hearted. It is not only helpful, but also not afraid of blackmail. Once, a passer-by found lying in the road, may be ill and moaning like, a lot of people crossing the road, do not dare to lend a hand to help, may be afraid of blackmail! Now the society is more complex. But my mother thought simple, save important. Do not consider other. They quickly put her back to the hospital to rescue, but also advance their own medical expenses. Later, the patient was saved, and the doctor said that if it was a little late, it might not work. Family members of the patient learned that the situation, very grateful to my mother, but also want to give my mother some thanks fee, but my mother refused. I say, is to help others help themselves, for all, all for me, when others are in trouble, people who need help, should help, if timid, think too much will lose the opportunity to save lives. Although the society has a lot of bad phenomenon, but always win evil justice. Our fine tradition of the Chinese nation, and is not lost. Even my mother like an ordinary female, will say such a sonorous and forceful words, I can't imagine!
My family is not rich, my mom is not afraid of tired, to earn money to get up early every day late. She is also a great woman.
My mother is an honest woman. She always keeps her word. Once, my mother promised her neighbors to help him buy things. My mother always remembers this and completes it on time. So I admire my mother.
I believe my mother is a great person, I respect my mother most.
.
我有很多钦佩的人。但我觉得最使敬佩的人，还是我的母亲，我也相信我的母亲也是世界上最伟大的人。
首先，我妈妈是一个好心人。她心地善良。它不但乐于助人，还不怕被讹诈。有一次，发现一个路人躺在路上，可能是发病了，呻吟痛苦的样子，过路的人很多，都不敢去伸出援手帮忙，可能是怕被讹诈吧！现在的社会比较复杂。但我妈思想单纯，救人要紧。不考虑其它。却快速把她背到医院去抢救，还自己垫付了一些医疗费。后来，那个病人得救了，医生说如果再来迟一点，可能就不行了。病人家属得知情况后，非常感谢我妈，还想多给我妈一些感谢费，却被我妈拒绝了。我吗说，帮助别人就是帮助自己，我为人人，人人为我，遇到别人有困难时，需要帮助的人，应该伸出援手，如果缩手缩脚，考虑太多就会失去挽救生命的机会。虽然这个社会有很多不良现象发生，但是正义总会争胜邪恶的。我们中华民族的优良传统，救死扶伤是不丢的。连我妈这样一个普通的女性，都会说出这样铿锵有力的话来，我真想不到啊！
我家不富裕，我妈不怕劳累，坚持每天早起摸黑的挣钱.。她也是一个伟大的女性。
我的母亲也是一个诚实的女人，她总是信守诺言。有一次，我妈妈答应她的邻居帮他买东西。我的母亲一直记住这一点，并按时完成。因此，我钦佩我的母亲。
我相信我的母亲是一个伟大的人，我最尊敬我的母亲。
First of all, my mother is a kind man. She is kind hearted. It is not only helpful, but also not afraid of blackmail. Once, a passer-by found lying in the road, may be ill and moaning like, a lot of people crossing the road, do not dare to lend a hand to help, may be afraid of blackmail! Now the society is more complex. But my mother thought simple, save important. Do not consider other. They quickly put her back to the hospital to rescue, but also advance their own medical expenses. Later, the patient was saved, and the doctor said that if it was a little late, it might not work. Family members of the patient learned that the situation, very grateful to my mother, but also want to give my mother some thanks fee, but my mother refused. I say, is to help others help themselves, for all, all for me, when others are in trouble, people who need help, should help, if timid, think too much will lose the opportunity to save lives. Although the society has a lot of bad phenomenon, but always win evil justice. Our fine tradition of the Chinese nation, and is not lost. Even my mother like an ordinary female, will say such a sonorous and forceful words, I can't imagine!
My family is not rich, my mom is not afraid of tired, to earn money to get up early every day late. She is also a great woman.
My mother is an honest woman. She always keeps her word. Once, my mother promised her neighbors to help him buy things. My mother always remembers this and completes it on time. So I admire my mother.
I believe my mother is a great person, I respect my mother most.
.
我有很多钦佩的人。但我觉得最使敬佩的人，还是我的母亲，我也相信我的母亲也是世界上最伟大的人。
首先，我妈妈是一个好心人。她心地善良。它不但乐于助人，还不怕被讹诈。有一次，发现一个路人躺在路上，可能是发病了，呻吟痛苦的样子，过路的人很多，都不敢去伸出援手帮忙，可能是怕被讹诈吧！现在的社会比较复杂。但我妈思想单纯，救人要紧。不考虑其它。却快速把她背到医院去抢救，还自己垫付了一些医疗费。后来，那个病人得救了，医生说如果再来迟一点，可能就不行了。病人家属得知情况后，非常感谢我妈，还想多给我妈一些感谢费，却被我妈拒绝了。我吗说，帮助别人就是帮助自己，我为人人，人人为我，遇到别人有困难时，需要帮助的人，应该伸出援手，如果缩手缩脚，考虑太多就会失去挽救生命的机会。虽然这个社会有很多不良现象发生，但是正义总会争胜邪恶的。我们中华民族的优良传统，救死扶伤是不丢的。连我妈这样一个普通的女性，都会说出这样铿锵有力的话来，我真想不到啊！
我家不富裕，我妈不怕劳累，坚持每天早起摸黑的挣钱.。她也是一个伟大的女性。
我的母亲也是一个诚实的女人，她总是信守诺言。有一次，我妈妈答应她的邻居帮他买东西。我的母亲一直记住这一点，并按时完成。因此，我钦佩我的母亲。
我相信我的母亲是一个伟大的人，我最尊敬我的母亲。
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I believe my mother is the greatest person in the word【应该是world】
语法没什么大问题，就是有点短，内容有点单薄，比如第二段，你只说了每天早起赚钱，为什么不扩充一下呢？你妈妈每天早上几点，在什么季节，早起去哪儿赚钱？怎么赚钱？为了省钱她都坐什么交通工具？在赚钱之余，她有没有做家务，照顾你？
还有第三段，你想表现你妈妈的诚实，除了从你妈妈的角度，写她遵守诺言，为什么不写一下你妈妈是怎么教育你诚实守信的呢？可以写一件你小时候你妈妈教育你要诚实的小事，不就从侧面烘托出你妈妈诚实的品质了嘛。
最后的总结段，你可以这样写：Although my mother is an ordinary person, I see plenty of great qualities from her. I will always honour her.
语法没什么大问题，就是有点短，内容有点单薄，比如第二段，你只说了每天早起赚钱，为什么不扩充一下呢？你妈妈每天早上几点，在什么季节，早起去哪儿赚钱？怎么赚钱？为了省钱她都坐什么交通工具？在赚钱之余，她有没有做家务，照顾你？
还有第三段，你想表现你妈妈的诚实，除了从你妈妈的角度，写她遵守诺言，为什么不写一下你妈妈是怎么教育你诚实守信的呢？可以写一件你小时候你妈妈教育你要诚实的小事，不就从侧面烘托出你妈妈诚实的品质了嘛。
最后的总结段，你可以这样写：Although my mother is an ordinary person, I see plenty of great qualities from her. I will always honour her.
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内容短没办法了，词数限制100-120，但要写两个故事.......
就是想请教一下哪些单词可以替换成更高级一些的单词，哪些句子可以用更高级的句子来表达
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把逗号去了
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