Question

一篇英语作文 麻烦请帮我指点一下

In mordern times,more and more mordern products are used througtout the world.cellphones are one of the mordern products .
cellphones are very useful. You can stay in touch with friends by cellphones.when you have problems you can also ask for help by cellphones.cellphones have an important role in the world.
but everything has two sides.
More and more functions are added to the cellphones.students always play games by cellphones,which make a big difference for sthdents' studies.And sometimes ,cellphones ring in the clasrome that is a very bad thing.It can interrupt teachers' mind
In my opinion ,I think we should make a good use of cellphones ,they should become us friends instads of foeman

Answer 1

在现代生活中，越来越多的现代产品在生活出普遍出现。手机就是其中一种现代（高科技）产品。
手机十分有用。你可以与你的朋友通过手机来保持联络。当你遇到问题（困难）时，你同样可以通过手机寻求帮助。手机在世上（生活中）扮演着重要的角色。
但是任何事物都具有两面性。
收集的功能越来越强大。学生们总是用手机玩游戏，它和学生的功课有着很大的不同。而且有时，手机会在教室突然响起，这可不是好现象。这（无疑）会妨碍教师的想法（教育）。
在我看来，我们应该使手机发挥更好的用途，它应该成为我们的朋友而不是敌人。
PS：同意楼上

Answer 2

太中式英语了！
make a big difference换成harmful to their studies
and sometimes……一句换成what is a bad thing when cellphones ring in the classroom.It would interrupt teaching and listening .
不要I think ,改为so.
they要点明是cellphones
us不对 ，应该是our