Question

高手进来帮我检查一下这段英语有没有什么语法不对的地方，谢谢！

Good morning, It's really a great honor to have this opportunity for a interview.I'mXX, I was born on February X, XXXX . My native place is XX. In 2010 I graduated from XX vocational education schools, my major is XX. My experience is not much, but I will try to learn about working knowledge, serious about this work, diligence and hard work.

大致意思是：
早上好，非常荣幸能有这个机会参加面试。我叫XX，我出生于XXXX年2月X日。我的籍贯是XX。在2010年我毕业于XX职业教育学校,我的专业是XX。我的经验不多,但是我会努力学习知识、严谨的工作为这工作勤奋和努力。

告诉我怎么改，谢谢！

Answer 1

你这个翻译太中文化了，很不地道。我改了一下：
Good morning, It's really a great honor for me to have this opportunity for this interview.I'mXX, born on February X, XXXX . My native place is XX. I graduated from XX vocational education schools in 2010, majoring in XX. Maybe I lack adequate experience in working knowledge, but I will try my best to fix it, arming my working attitude in concentration, diligence and hardness.

Answer 2

(你的也很好但这个可能会相对通畅点，没有太过于书面化 希望能帮到你）
大概内容： 从 “我的经验不多。。。。。。。为这工作勤奋和努力。” 开始改

：

Although I don't have much experience, I'll work hard , be Rigorous to the job that I've got and learn from what I'll be expericed.

虽然我的经验不多，但我会努力严谨地工作， 从我将会得到的工作经验中学习

Answer 3

这一段这么改改会不会好点：
Good morning.It is really a great honor to have this interview.My name is xx,I was born on xx Feburary,XXXX at xxxx(出生地）。During 2006 to 2010,I have studied xx(专业) in xx(学校）。As a graduation ,I know that I do not have much experience.but I have great passion and I am eager to learn more.I have confidence to do a good job with my diligence .Thank you!
我翻译的也不是太好，还请指正！
主要指出两个问题1·尽量不要用简写形式，如 It's 等，这样会比较庄重
2·尽量简洁，短小精悍
谢谢

Answer 4

Good morning, It's really a great honor to have this opportunity for a(an) interview.I'mXX, I was born on February X, XXXX . My native place is XX. (My home town is ...)In 2010 I (have)graduated from XX vocational education schools, my major is XX. My (work)experience is not (so)much, but I earn to learn the knowledge about this work, I'll try my best to this work, Please believe me and give me the chance.