较长的英语笑话

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较长的英语笑话

  导语:其实学习英语也可以变得很有趣味的,关键在于怎样学习。下面我给大家收集整理了几篇较长的英语笑话,希望大家喜欢。

  较长的英语笑话【1】

  Peter joined the army when he was eighteen,and for several months he was taught how to be a good soldier.He did quite well in everything except shooting.One day he and his friends were practicing their shooting,and all of them were doing quite well except Peter.After he had shot at the target nine times and had not hit it once,the officer who was trying to teach the young soldiers to shoot said,"You're quite hopeless,Peter!Don't waste your last bullet too!Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it!"

  Peter felt ashamed.He went behind the wall,and a few seconds later the officer and the other young soldiers heard the sound of a shot.

  "Heavens!" the officer said."Has that silly man really shot himself?"

  He ran behind the wall anxiously,but Peter was all right."I'm sorry,sir," he said,"but I missed again."

  彼得十八岁那年参了军,他需要参加几个月的学习以成为一名好士兵.彼得在其他方面都做得很好,但是射击不行.一天他和伙伴们练习射击,除了彼得其他人都没有问题.他射了九次,一次也没有命中目标.这时,教新兵射击的教官说:“彼得,你看来是没希望了,不要连最后一发子弹都浪费掉!去那堵墙后面用它向自己打一枪吧.”

  彼得感到非常惭愧.他走到那堵墙后面.几分钟后,教官和新兵们听到一声枪响.

  “上帝!”教官叫起来,“难道那个笨蛋真的'朝自己开枪了?”

  他急忙跑到那堵墙后面,发现彼得安然无恙.“对不起,长官,”他说,“我还是没有命中.”

  较长的英语笑话【2】

  Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says, "Congratulations, you got twins." The man said "How strange, I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says

  "Congratulations, you got twins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's wrong? I work for 7up"!

  四个好朋友在医院里碰面了,他们的妻子正在生产.护士过来对第一个男人说:"恭喜,你得了双胞胎."男人说:"多奇怪呀,我是明尼苏达双子队的经理."过了一会儿,护士过来对第二个男人说:"恭喜,你得了三胞胎."男人很喜欢:"嗯,又巧了.我是3M公司的董事."最后,护士跑来对第三个男人说:"恭喜,你得了2对双胞胎."男人很开心地说:"真令人啼笑皆非,我为四季宾馆工作."他们三个都很高兴,但第四个伙伴急得像热锅上的蚂蚁,咒骂上帝并用头撞墙.他们问他有什么不对劲,他回答道:"什么不对劲?我可是在七喜公司工作呀!"

  较长的英语笑话【3】

  In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."

  在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭里,一位年轻女士被带到法官面前,她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单.女士向法官解释,她是一名学校老师,请求法官马上处理她的案子,以便可以赶回去上课.法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠,说道:“你是学校的老师,对吗?女士,我马上要实现我毕生的愿望了.在那张桌子旁坐下,写‘我开车闯了红灯’500遍.”

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