Question

求雅思高手帮忙 我作文不太好，希望大家看看给打个分，帮我改改

As for elderly, living in caring house is better than living at home with young children. Present your argument to illustrate whether you agree or disagree.

There is a growing tendency that more and more youngs sent their olders in their familiy to the caring house because they are too busy to take care of the olders.They say that caring houses will look after their parents and grandparents well.Personally,I am not a supporter to this view as well.
Firstly,there is an undeniable fact that many of those caring house can not offer a comfortable environment to olders because they do not have adequate advanced facilities.So we cant not ensure the olders have a high level of living condition in the caring houses.On the other hand,since all the nurses in the caring house are aiming to earn money with this job so we should not expect that they will treat the olders the same way as we do in our home.
Moreover,as we are all aware,leaving the seniors in the caring houses is harmful to the relationship between the olders and young generations since elders may tend to get a conclusion that their kids do not care them anymore and yongs do want to take the responsibility of looking after them.Futher more, elders will more likely to feel longly and upset which may even contribute to some health issues.
Of coures,we must admit that to the olders without kids,living in a caring house is a favorable choice because nursing houses will offer them a basic living condition to survive.
From what has been discussed above,we can easily reach to the conclusion that youngs ought to take care of their parents or grandparents at home rather than leave them into a caring house.While for those olders without kids and other familiy members,living in a nursing house or a caring house is a reasonable choice.

Answer 1

还行，给个A-。至于改，你去英汉词典翻译下全文，让后结合你们现在学的知识（我不知你们几年级）给全文来点改观，就OK了

Answer 2

4.5~~
多看范文咯。

Answer 3

不孬，给个A吧。去查查就知道了

Answer 4

不赖嘛～A