Question

cambridge IELTS 4的雅思小作文writing task 1 帮忙修改一下，谢谢，顺便告诉一下大概多少分左右

This line graph illustrate that visits to and from UK and the bar chart tells which is the favorite country that UK resident love to visit in 1999.

The line graph contain two curves which stands for the popularities of UK residents visiting abroad and foreigners visit to UK respectively. Both the two curves are in increase. Curve of UK residents visiting abroad rise slowly between 12 million in 1979 to 20 million in 1985. Later it jump rapidly in 1985 and peak at 52 million in 1999. The other curve representing of foreigners traveling in UK is all under the one of UK residents’ visiting. Besides ,this curve share the same point in shooting up in 1985.

The bar chart tells the most popular countries that UK resident love to visit comparing Turkey ,Greece, America,Spain and France. The favorite one is France with almost 12 million of UK resident used to visit there. And the second one is Spain with 9 million closely. The last of three countries is no more than 4 million.

Overall, foreign people who travel to UK is less than UK resident visiting to outside. And France is the preferable country to UK residents to visit.

Answer 1

错误太多了，从句问题 个别的词汇用法 时态问题 主谓一致问题等等 作文有拼凑的嫌疑 思路太乱
最多4分
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