英语幽默故事30字.

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Doctor:Please open your mouth,madam. Lady:Thank you very much,doctor. Doctor:Why do you thank me? Lady:Because my hu *** and always asked me to shut up. 医生:请打开你的嘴,夫人。 女士:谢谢你,医生。 医生:你为什么谢我? 女士:因为我丈夫总是让我闭嘴。   幽默英语故事(有翻译哦!) 2009-07-09 13:01

1.piccola once there lived in france a little girl name piccola. when she was very young, her father died, and her mother was very, very poor. one christmas eve piccola said to her mother, "mamma, will uncle santa e to our house tonight?" her mother felt very sad and shook her head. before she went to bed, piccola took off her little wooden shoes and put them on the floor near the chimney. she said to her mother, “perhaps uncle santa will e.” all was white with snow outside, and it was very cold. in the night a little bird with a broken wing fell down the chimney and hopped into one of the shoes. very early in the morning piccola woke up. she jumped out of bed and ran to look into her shoes. there she saw the little bird in one of the shoes. she picked up the shoe and ran to show her christmas present to her mother. she said, "santa claus did not fet me, mamma." 2.pandora's box many years ago all the word was very beautiful and nobody was ever sick or unhappy. at that time there lived a beautiful little girl named pandora. one day gave her a wonderful box tied with a golden cord and made her promise not to open it. pandora and her little playmate, epimetheus, often looked at the box and wondered what was in it. for a long time pandora kept her promise to the fairy, but at last she wanted to peep into the box. she untied the cord and lifted the cover only a little. out flew hundreds of bad little fairies. they stung pandora and she fell on the floor and screamed. they stung epimetheus, too. then they flew out of doors and stung all the children in the land. by and by pandora heard a little voice crying, “let me out, and i will help you,” she opened the box, and out flew a beautiful little fairy. she told pandora that her name was hope. she kissed her and epimetheus, and made them well. then away she flew to help the other children. to this day, when people are sick or unhappy, the good little fairy, hope, es to fort them. 3.the crab and his mother “my child,” said a crab to her son, “why do you walk so awkward? if you wish to make a good appearance, you should go straight forward, and not to one side as you do so constantly.” “i do wish to make a good appearance, mamma” said the young crab; “and if you will show me how, i will try to walk straight forward.” “why, this is the way, of course,” said the mother, as she started off to the right, “no, this is the way,” said she, as she made another attempt, to the left. the little crab *** iled. “ when you learn to do it yourself, you can teach me,” he said, and he went back to his play. 4.the wolf and the crane one day a wolf, who was eating his dinner much too fast, swallowed a bone, which stuck in his throat and pained him very much. he tried to get it out, but could not. just then he saw a crane passing by. “dear fiend,” said he to the crane, “ there is a bone sticking in my throat. you have a good long neck; can't you reach down and pull it out? i will pay you well for it.” “i'll try,” said the crane. then he put his head into the wolf’s mouth, beeen his sharp teeth, and reaching down, pulled out bone. “there!” said the wolf, “i am glad it is out; i must be more careful another time.” “i will go now, if you will pay me,” said the crane. “pay you, indeed!” cried the wolf. “be thankful that i did not bite your head off when it was in my mouth. you ought to be content with that.” 5. handel, the musician long ago they're lived in germany a little boy named gee frederick handel. he loved music and wanted to learn to play the piano, but his father wanted him to bee a lawyer and would not let him take music lessons. there was a little, old-fashioned piano up in the attic. at night, when everybody was asleep, the little boy used to creep up the stairs and play softly to himself. when he was about seven years old, he went with his father to visit a wealthy duke. the duke lived in a beautiful palace with many large rooms. there was a wonderful an in one of the rooms. while his father and the duke sat talking, little handel slipped away. he sat down at the an and began to play. his little hands moved over the keys and the room was filled with a sweetest music. when he finished playing, he turned around and saw his father and the duke looking at him. the duke asked him where he had learned to play, and the boy told him about the piano in the attic. then the duke persuaded handle's father to let him study music, and he became a famous poser.

中文解释:

1.piccola 一旦有住在法国一个小女孩的名字piccola 。当她很年轻,她的父亲去世,与她的母亲是非常,非常恶劣。 一圣诞前夕piccola说,她的母亲, “妈妈,叔叔圣来我们家今晚” ?她的母亲感到非常难过和摇头。 之前她到床上, piccola脱掉她的小木头鞋,把他们在地板上附近的烟囱。她说她的母亲, “叔叔,也许圣诞老人会来” 。 全部是白色以外的大雪,这是十分寒冷。 在夜间1一只小鸟与一个破碎机翼倒下烟囱和跳频到其中的鞋。很早就在上午piccola醒来。她跳出床和冉照顾到她的鞋。 有她看到一只小鸟在其中的鞋。她拿起了鞋跑,以显示她的圣诞礼物,以她的母亲。她说, “圣诞老人并没有忘记我,妈妈” 。 2.pandora ' s盒 很多年前的所有字是非常美丽,没有人是以往任何时候都生病或不愉快。 在当时的生活有一个美丽的小女孩,名为潘朵拉。一天给了她美好的框捆绑与黄金线,使她的承诺,不要打开它。潘朵拉和她的小玩伴, epimetheus ,往往在票房上,并想知道是什么在它。 相当长的时间潘多拉把她的承诺,童话,但最后她想窥视到方块。她解开电线和解除只包括很少。 列飞抵数以百计的坏的小仙女。他们丁潘朵拉,她倒在地上,尖叫着。他们丁epimetheus ,太。 然后,他们飞往走出大门和丁所有儿童在土地。由和由潘朵拉听到一点声音,哭泣, “让我出来,我会帮助你, ” 她打开框中,并指出飞到一个美丽的小仙女。她告诉潘朵拉说,她的名字是希望。她亲吻了她和epimetheus ,并作出了他们。然后离开她飞往帮助其他孩子。 为了这一天,当人们生病或不愉快,良好的小童话,希望,来安慰他们。 三,蟹和他的母亲 “我的孩子,说: ”蟹,她的儿子, “你为什么走这么尴尬?如果你想有一个良好的外观,您应该直行向前,而不是一方作为您这样做,不断“ 。 “我确实希望有一个良好的外观,妈妈说: ”年轻的蟹; “如果你将告诉我如何,我会尽量走直线前进” 。 “为什么,这是方法,当然,说: ”妈妈,因为她开始起飞的权利, “不,这是道路, ”她说,由于她作出的又一次尝试,到左边。 小蟹笑了。 “当你学习做自己,您可以教导我, ”他说,他回到他的发挥。 4 ,狼和起重机 一天狼,谁是他吃晚餐太大,速度快,吞下了一根骨头,停留在他的喉咙和痛苦,他非常欣赏。他试图让出来,但不能。 刚才,然后他看到起重机通过。 “亲爱的恶魔, ”他说,以起重机, “是有骨贴在我的喉咙。你有一个很好的长期颈部;你们不能达到下来,拉出来?我会支付给您,以及为它“ ”我会尝试,说: “起重机。然后他把他的头到狼的嘴,他之间的尖锐的牙齿,和深远的下跌,退出骨。 “有!说: ”狼来了, “我很高兴,这是我必须更加小心,再一次” , “我会继续现在,如果你将支付我说: ”起重机。 “支付给您,的确! ”哭狼来了。 “心存感激,我并没有咬你的头上时,这是在我嘴里。你应该得到的内容与“ 。 5 。韩德尔,音乐家 不久前,他们居住在德国的一个小男孩命名为乔治冯检韩德尔。 他热爱音乐和想学习弹钢琴,但他的父亲希望他成为一名律师,会不会让他采取音乐的经验教训。 有一点点,老式钢琴,在阁楼。在夜间,当大家都睡了,小男孩用蠕变了楼梯和发挥自己的温柔。 他约七岁他与父亲访问富裕杜克。公爵住在一个美丽的宫殿,与许多大的房间。有一个奇妙的器官,在其中一个房间。 而他的父亲和公爵坐在所说的,小亨德尔的下滑距离。他坐下来,在器官,并开始发挥。他的小手移动的钥匙和房间内充满了与香甜的音乐。 当他演奏完毕,他回过头,看到他的父亲和公爵看他。公爵问他那里,他学会了发挥,和该名男童告诉他,关于钢琴,在阁楼上。 然后公爵说服处理的父亲让他学音乐,他成了一位著名的作曲家。

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