帮忙改一篇英语作文!!急

apersonwhohelpedmealotthereisaperson,whohelpedmealot.sheismymother.sheiskindandattent... a person who helped me a lot

there is a person, who helped me a lot.she is my mother.she is kind and attentive.i love her very much.once i had i fever.she looked after me night and day.she made delicious food for me,but her meals wasn't as well as mine.if she didn't take care of me such great,i wouldn't get well such quickly.besides that,she sends me to school every day .and she has to get up early to prepare breakfast.i still remenber one thing.last term,i told her thati didn't get good grades in the Chinese test.instead of getting angry on me,she soothed me.(……)
All in all then,she helped me a lot.and she brought me happiness and power.

帮忙改一下,谢了!!好像语法和时态有些问题
括号内要加一句话……
万分感谢!!!!!!
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1anonymity2
2010-08-17
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1.once i had i fever.she looked after me night and day
had i fever改为had a fever
点号改为逗号
night and day改为day and night
2.if she didn't take care of me such great,i wouldn't get well such quickly.
这里应该是虚拟语气
didn't take改为hadn't taken
wouldn't get改为wouldn't have got
3.besides that
应去掉that
4.and she has to get up early to prepare breakfast.
这里and应该为so
5.getting angry on me
angry改为anger
on改为with
6.最后一句时态应是一般现在时
(she said that everything would go well soon.)
小小夏木木
2010-08-17
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night and day改为day and night
besides that 改为besides
sends改为sent
has改为had
(she really moved me。)
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huakaibujinian
2010-08-17 · TA获得超过2077个赞
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once i had a fever
顺序换一下,day and night
her meals weren't……
If she didn't take good care of me,I wouldn't get well so soon
besides后面不用跟that了,太冗长
all in all 后面的then最好也不要了

( I am very grateful while looking bach on these things)
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gloria214
2010-08-17 · 超过18用户采纳过TA的回答
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The person who helped me a lot is my mother.she is kindly and friendly and I love her very much. Once I had a fever.she looked after me night and day: she made delicious food for me,but hers was different from mine.If she hadn't taken good care of me,I couldn't get well so quickly.In addition, she takes me to school every day .and she has to get up earlier to prepare for my breakfast.I still remenber one thing.Last term,I told her that I hadn't got good grades in the Chinese test.instead of making her unhappy and gave me a lesson,however she tole me to find the reasons why I failed to get good marks.
All in all ,she helped me a lot.and she gave me happiness and power.I love my mother just as she loves me.

希望对你有所帮助!
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