Question

请帮忙改改英语作文.

Sunshine
“Today is brutal, more brutal tomorrow, the day after tomorrow is beautiful, but the majority of people dies on tomorrow night, can’t see the next day’s sunshine.”, by Jack Ma, founder of Alibaba. I do have a dream, that one day I will be able to point on top of a mountain and say something like “that area of houses are mine.” The key is to survive today and tomorrow.
In order to live till tomorrow, I must survive today. I do believe in fate, and I also believe I have the power to trim my fate. Back when I was in China, I’m considered someone that is hopeless, or simply a scumbag, and I was. Thanks to my fate, I’m here in America. It was the first day of my middle school, I know I have two choice of my future, one is to continue being a scumbag or I can shut my mouth, not distracting the class, and listen. I made my decision I choose to learn. It was my decision that changed my fate. The first time my faith brought me a good news, it’s the first week of my senior year in high school, I was looking forward to join a club in high school, turns out there is a new club needs more people, which is robotic. So I went and ask if I can join, and I did. In the team of robotics people were discussing who is going to be what, I was expecting I’m going to be the programmer on the team, but I wasn’t, instead I was the team captain, because I’m the only person knows how to write codes for robot. Now I’m in college, still struggling, knowing tomorrow it’s going to be brutal, but or my dream I must survive.
Tomorrow is tomorrow, I live in today, I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but I can plan for it, and wishing something better will happen. My plan for tomorrow is simply not to make any trouble, and do all my work as hard as I can, and to do them correctly, on time. What usually happens is, I will make some trouble, I can’t do most of my work as hard as I can, and I can’t do everything correctly, and I tempt to delay things I’m do, but I survived. I planned to do everything, I planned to do everything the best I can, but I choose only to do ones that are important to me. After reading “The 7 habits of highly successful people”, by Stephen R. Covey. I learned to choose what to do, he categorized what to do in four areas, important and urgent, important not urgent, not important but urgent, not important not urgent. I force myself not to do things that are not important, and try to avoid things that are important and urgent, because I should plan for it, so it won’t be urgent. Also force myself doing things that is important not urgent, that’s what separates people from successful and not successful. For example reading a text book, that it’s important, but it’s urgent, so most people would make excuse not to do it. I choose to do it, so I will make myself fit better in the society and survive. That’s how I prepare myself to survive tomorrow.
还有一段在问题补充.
According to what Jack Ma said, majority of people dies on tomorrow’s brutal night. I consider tomorrow as the most important day in my life, so I will prepare myself not to die on the brutal night, and to make sure I see the next day’s sunshine.

我不是想秀我的英语， 我英语烂着呢语法错误肯定很多.我想在交作业前找人帮忙改改，为了能在大学里拿到好的成绩.错过了一些事了，这是我能吃到的最后一颗后悔药了.

Answer 1

【xxx】是建议删掉的，(xxx)是修改建议。

Sunshine
“Today is brutal, more brutal tomorrow, the day after tomorrow 【is】(will be) beautiful, but the majority of people 【dies】(will die) on tomorrow night, 【can’t】(unable to) see the next day’s sunshine.” (These are the words said) by Jack Ma, founder of Alibaba. I do have a dream, that one day I will be able to point 【on】(to the) top of a mountain and say something like “【that area of】(those) houses are mine.” The key is to survive today and tomorrow.
In order to live till tomorrow, I must survive today. I do believe in fate, and I also believe I have the 【power to trim】(ability to master) my fate. Back when I was in China, 【I’m】(I was) considered (as) someone that 【is】(was) hopeless, or simply a scumbag, and I was. Thanks to my fate, I’m here in America.
It was the first day of my middle school, I 【know I have two choice of】(knew I had two choices for) my future, one 【is】(was) to continue being a scumbag or I 【can】(could) shut my mouth, not 【distracting】(to distract but pay attention to) the class. 【and listen】 I made my decision 【I choose】 to learn. It was my decision that changed my fate；the first time (that) my faith brought me 【a】good news.
It’s the first week of my senior year in high school, I was looking forward to 【join】(joining) a club in high school；【turns out there is】 (it turned out that there was) a new club 【needs】(needing) more people, which 【is】(was the) robotic (club). So I went and 【ask if I can】(asked if I could) join (the club), and I 【did】(could). In the team of robotics, people were discussing who 【is】(was) going to be what, I was expecting 【I’m going】 to be the programmer on the team, but I wasn’t；instead I was the team captain, because 【I’m】(I was) the only person 【knows】(who knew) how to write codes for robot. Now I’m in college, still struggling, knowing tomorrow 【it’s】(is) going to be brutal, but 【or】(for the sake of) my dream, I must survive.
Tomorrow is tomorrow, I live in today, I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but I can plan (and prepare) for it, and 【wishing】(wish for) something better 【will】(to) happen. My plan for tomorrow is simply not to make any trouble, and do all my work as hard as I can, and to do them correctly, （and）on time. What usually happens is, I will make some trouble, I can’t do most of my work as hard as I can, and I can’t do everything correctly, and I tempt to delay things I’m 【do】(doing), but I 【survived】(manage to survive). I planned to do everything, I planned to do everything the best I can, but I choose only to do ones that are important to me. After reading “The 7 habits of highly successful people” (written) by Stephen R. Covey, I (have) learned to choose what to do, he 【categorized】(categorizes) what to do in four areas, important and urgent, important (but) not urgent, not important but urgent, not important (and) not urgent. I force myself not to do things that are not important, and try to avoid things that are important and urgent, because I should plan for it, so it won’t be urgent. Also (I) force myself doing things that 【is】(are) important (but) not urgent, that’s what separates people from successful and not successful. For example reading a text book, that it’s important, but it’s (not) urgent, so most people would make excuse not to do it. I choose to do it, so I will make myself fit better 【in the】(to) society and survive. That’s how I prepare myself to survive tomorrow.
According to what Jack Ma (had) said, (the) majority of people 【dies】(would die) on tomorrow’s brutal night. I consider tomorrow as the most important day in my life, so I will prepare myself not to die on the brutal night, and to make sure I (shall) see the next day’s sunshine.

【英语牛人团】

Answer 2

1.the majority of people die...
2.that area of houses is mine
3.I was considered as someone that was hopeless...
4.I have two choices of....
5.not distracting the class-----focusing on classes
6.I made my decision I chose to learn
7.the first time my faith brought me good news.
8.look forward to joining ......
9...if I could join
10.I did.....I made it
11.but for my dream I must survive...
11.who was going to be...
12.I was expecting that I was going to be
13.because I was the only person knew...
14.and wish......
15.What usually happens is ..I make some trouble...
16..delay things I have to finish
大部分还可以 ,只是注意标点符号和时态.
我还建议你看看关于写作的书,第一段写论点,中心大意,第二段写过去什么样,第三段写现在什么样,第四段写将来什么样,最后总结

Answer 3

兄弟你是想秀你英语吧。。。。
在美国读过高中还要叫别人该作文。。。。。
你居心何在阿。。。。

Answer 4

你好，我是英语专业的 我就在里面该吧，错误不是很多 希望能帮到你。

Sunshine
“Today is brutal, it will be more brutal tomorrow, besides,it is beautifulthe day after tomorrow , but most people die on tomorrow night, it can’t see the sunshine of the next day .”, by Jack Ma, founder of Alibaba. I do have a dream, that one day I would be able to point on top of a mountain and say something like “that area of houses are mine.” The key is to survive today and tomorrow.
In order to live till tomorrow, I must survive today. I do believe in fate, and I also believe I have the power to trim my fate. Back when I was in China, I’m considered someone that is hopeless, or simply a scumbag, and I was. Thanks to my fate, I’m here in America. It was the first day of my middle school, I know I have two choice of my future, one is to continue being a scumbag or I can shut my mouth, not distract the class, and listen. I make my decision I choose to learn. It was my decision that changes my fate. The first time my faith brings me a good news, it’s the first week of my senior year in high school, I was looking forward to join a club in high school, that's there is a new club needs more people, which is robotic. So I went and asked if I can join in, and it did. In the team of robotics people were discussing who was going to be what, I was expecting I’m going to be the programmer on the team, but I wasn’t, instead I was the team captain, because I’m the only person knows how to paragraph codes for robot. Now I’m in college, still struggling, knowing tomorrow it would be brutal, but or my dream I must survive.
Tomorrow is tomorrow, I live in today, I don’t know what would happen tomorrow, but I can plan for it, and wishing something better will happen. My plan for tomorrow is simply not to make any troubles, and do all my work as hard as I can, and to work them out correctly and on time. What usually happens is, I will make some trouble, I can’t do most of my work as hard as I can, and I can’t do everything correctly, and I tempt to delay things I’m do, but I survived. I planned to do everything, I planned to do everything the best I can, but I choose only to do that are important to me. After reading “The 7 habits of highly successful people”, by Stephen R. Covey. I learned to choose what to do, he categorized what to do in four areas, important and urgent, important not urgent, not important but urgent, not important not urgent. I force myself not to do things that are not important, and try to avoid things that are important and urgent, because I should plan for it, so it won’t be urgent. Also force myself doing things that are important not urgent, that’s what separates people from successful and not successful. For example reading a text book, that it’s important, also it’s urgent, so most people would make excuse not to do it. I choose to do it, so I will make myself fit better in the society and survive. That’s how I prepare myself to survive tomorrow.

According to what Jack Ma said, majority of people die on tomorrow’s brutal night. I consider tomorrow as the most important day in my life, so I will prepare myself not to die on the brutal night, and to make sure I see the sunshine of the next day .