Question

我的一篇演讲稿。请各位大哥帮忙修改一下啊，主要是语法错误。。。谢谢

I'm unique
1.8 metres in height,60 kilos in weight,a little thin,a little black in skin.And this is what I am.
It seems that you can find hundreds of guys like me in the street.Actually,I'm just an ordinary people in this large earth,without any differences from others,as a grain of sand in the desert.However,even though you can find a person as same as me in appearance,he still couldn't replace me.Because my thought is unique.Furthermore,compared with myself,I'm different to me that a secong ago.Because my thought is unique.So no one can replace me.Of course,you may say to me that I can never be the second Bill Gates.That's right.But why should I do that?I'm what I am!If I want to be successful,I don't need to be the second Bill Gates.I can be the first George.And I'm George.
Thank you for your listening.

Answer 1

I'm unique
1.8 metres tall,60 kilos weight,(最好用英制，6 feet, 130 pounds)a little thin,a little black (dark不是black)skin,this is what (who!)I am.
(It seems that 删)you can find hundreds of guys like me in the street.Actually(构不成转折，用递进或者不用关联词),I'm just an ordinary people（person 单数） in this（the，唯一） large earth,without any differences(difference 否定用单数) from others,as a grain of sand in the desert.However,even though you can find a person (as 删) same as me in appearance,he still couldn't replace me.Because my thought is unique.Furthermore,compared with myself,I'm different to me that a secong ago.(改 Furthermore, I'm different comparing to myself just a second ago.) Because my thought is unique(改 Because my thought is constantly changing.)So no one can replace me.Of course,you may say (to me 删）that I can never be the second （another）Bill Gates.That's right.But why should I do that?I'm what(who) I am!If I want to be successful,I don't need to be the second Bill Gates.(I don't need to follow Bill Gates's footsteps.)I can be the first George.And I'm George.
Thank you. (for your listening 删）

PS: 毕竟是你的演讲稿，我只能改这么多。

Answer 2

有些说法似乎不太地道呢，帮你改了下。

I'm unique

1.8 metres in height, 60 kilos in weight, a bit skinny and a little tanned. And this is what I am.
It seems that you can find hundreds of guys like me on the street. Actually, I'm just an ordinary person on this large earth. There is no difference between me and any other; just like a grain of sand in the vast desert. However, even though you can find a person the same as me in appearance, he still cannot replace me; because my thoughts are unique. Furthermore, when compared with myself, I'm different to the self that was a second ago; because my thoughts are unique. Therefore no one can replace me. Of course, you may say to me that I will never be the second Bill Gates. That's true. But why would I do that? I'm what I am! If I want to be successful, I don't need to be the second Bill Gates. I can be the first George. And my name is George

Thank you for your patience (一般是这样表达谢谢的哦)

Answer 3

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