Question

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some people think that rich countries giving aid to the poor countries has more negative impact than positive impact.To what extent do you agree or disagree

In this day and age,whether aid given by rich cities has more merits than demerits is a frenquent topic of discussion.Some people hold that wealth countries has downsidea outweigh upsides in assisting them.In this essay,I wil analyse their thought in detail.

It is manifest that rich cities do harm to poor countries. To start with,there are less space for local residents to live in a comfortable life.Specifically, an increasing number of urban people continuously migrate to the rural area,which not only raise the population of suburban person but also constrain their free place.Moreover,the problem of pollution is becoming increasingly severe.For instance, as a result urban people establish numerous gorgeous house or set up some individual factories,which indeed exert detrimental on the field and local inhabitants.

Admmittedly,wealth countries definitely afford positive influences.The main reason is that government allocate money to the rural area in order to build some schools for young children.Obviously,schools enable many teenagers to aquire imperative knowledge,which contribute to the rural education.It renders them expand their outlook that not only in the surface of absorbing essences of knowledge,but also deeply impact their heart.

In conclusion,poor countries indeed has many advantages provided by rich countries in terms of technology and structure.However,more disadvantages were brought to rural area,which lead them a stressful life.I think government should limit some urban residents move to countries and set up too much factries or buildings as to insure there is sufficient space for local inhabitants.

Answer 1

"文章不是很切题，讨论的主题是帮助的利弊，不是国家发展的利弊，以及政府的措施。用词还是准确的。句式能够理解，但缺乏变化，所以整体分数是5.5 分

In this day and age/这句话我看的都快吐了，但并不错,whether aid given by rich cities has more merits than demerits is a frenquent topic of discussion.Some people hold that wealth countries has downsidea outweigh upsides in assisting them/逻辑和语法都不对 it is often mentioned assisting poor countries has more advantages than disadvantages.In this essay,I wil analyse their thought/thoughts in detail.
It is manifest that rich cities do harm to poor countries/assistance from rich countries does have some harms to poor ones. To start with,there are less space for local residents to live in/去掉 a comfortable life.Specifically, an increasing number of urban people continuously migrate to the rural area,which not only raise the population of suburban person but also constrain their free place.Moreover,the problem of pollution is becoming increasingly severe.For instance, as a result urban people establish numerous gorgeous house or set up some individual factories,which indeed exert detrimental on the field and local inhabitants.
以上两点都不是很切题，只是国家发展的弊端，而题目是写外来的帮助所带来的弊端，要想得到满意的分数，就要尽可能扣题

Admmittedly,wealth countries/wealthy countries’ help definitely afford positive influences.The main reason is that government allocate money to the rural area in order to build some schools for young children.Obviously,schools enable many teenagers to aquire imperative knowledge,which contribute to the rural education.It renders them /to expand their outlook that not only in the surface of absorbing essences of knowledge,but also deeply impact their heart./整句不合适 要改成 it give them a quici and easy access to knowledge outside countries. To make things better, they will definitely havest mental benefits
In conclusion,poor countries /文章的主题词是帮助，不是国家indeed has many advantages provided by rich countries in terms of technology and structure.However,more disadvantages were/are brought to rural area,which lead them a stressful life.I think government should limit some urban residents move to countries and set up too much factries or buildings as to insure there is sufficient space for local inhabitants

"

Answer 2

有些人认为富有的国家提供援助以贫穷的国家比多的负面冲击积极的影响你在多大程度上同意或不同意
在如今这个时代,无论富裕地区所提供的援助比更具优点缺点是一个frenquent讨论的话题一些人认为财富国家超过它的downsidea帮助他们在本文中,我将分析他们的思想进行了详细的介绍。
这是很明显的是富裕地区对贫困的国家。首先,有较少的空间为当地居民生活在舒适的生活。具体地说,越来越多的城市居民不断迁移到农村地区,不仅有助于提高人口郊区的人,但是也限制自己的自由的地方此外,污染问题日益严重例如,由于建立众多的华丽的城市居民的房子去,或者我设置了一些个人工厂,而且确实发挥有害的在球场上和当地居民。
Admmittedly、财富国家积极影响绝对负担主要原因是政府把钱农村地区,以建立一些学校对年幼的孩子很明显,学校使许多青少年获得必要的知识,这有助于对当代农村教育它使他们扩大他们的眼界,不仅在表面的吸收精华的知识,同时深深地影响了他们的心。
总之,贫穷国家提供确实有很多优势富裕国家从技术和结构然而,更多的缺点了农村地区,领他们紧张生活我认为政府应该限制一些城市居民搬到国家和建立了太多的factries或建筑物,以确保有足够的空间,为当地的居民。

Answer 3

你想要哪一方面的改正啊，是语法吗，还是什么？