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several years ago,while,attending a communication course,I experienced a most unusual process.The instructor asked us to list anything in our past that we felt guilty about,or regretted.The next week he invited participants to read their lists aloud.This seemed like a very private matter,but there’s always some brave soul in the crowd who will volunteer.As people read their lists,mine grew longer.After three weeks,I had 101 items on my list.The instructor then suggested that we find ways to apologize to people,or take some action to right any wrongdoing.I was seriously wondering how this could ever improve my communications.
The next week ,the man next to me raised his hand and volunteered this story:
"while making my list,I remenbered an incident from high school.I grew up in a small town in lowa.There was a police officer in the town that none of us kids liked.one night, my two friends and I decided to play a trick on the officer,Brown.After drinking a few beers, we found a can of red paint, climed the tall water tank in the middle of the town, and wrote, on the tank in bright red letters:Sheriff Brown is a big fool.The next day,the town arose to see our sign.Within two hours,Brown had my two pales and me in his office.My friends confessed and I lied, denying the truth.No one ever found out.
"Nearly twenty years later,Brown’s name appears on my list.I didn’t even know if he was still alive.Last weekend,I dialed infomation in my hometown back in lowa.Sure enough, there was a Roger Brown still listed.I dialed his number.After a few rings, ‘Hello?’I said,‘Mr Brown?’Pause.‘Yeah.’‘well,this is Jimmy Calkins.And I want you to know that I did it .’Pause.‘I knew it.’he said.We had a good laugh and a lively discussion.His clothing words were,‘I always felt bad for you bcause your friends got it off their chest, and I knew you were carring it around all these years...’”
Jimmy inspired me to clear up all 101 items on my list.It took me almost two years, but became the true inspiration for my career as a conflict mediator. No matter how difficult the conflict,crisis or situation is, I always remember that is never too late to clear up the past and make a new start.
The next week ,the man next to me raised his hand and volunteered this story:
"while making my list,I remenbered an incident from high school.I grew up in a small town in lowa.There was a police officer in the town that none of us kids liked.one night, my two friends and I decided to play a trick on the officer,Brown.After drinking a few beers, we found a can of red paint, climed the tall water tank in the middle of the town, and wrote, on the tank in bright red letters:Sheriff Brown is a big fool.The next day,the town arose to see our sign.Within two hours,Brown had my two pales and me in his office.My friends confessed and I lied, denying the truth.No one ever found out.
"Nearly twenty years later,Brown’s name appears on my list.I didn’t even know if he was still alive.Last weekend,I dialed infomation in my hometown back in lowa.Sure enough, there was a Roger Brown still listed.I dialed his number.After a few rings, ‘Hello?’I said,‘Mr Brown?’Pause.‘Yeah.’‘well,this is Jimmy Calkins.And I want you to know that I did it .’Pause.‘I knew it.’he said.We had a good laugh and a lively discussion.His clothing words were,‘I always felt bad for you bcause your friends got it off their chest, and I knew you were carring it around all these years...’”
Jimmy inspired me to clear up all 101 items on my list.It took me almost two years, but became the true inspiration for my career as a conflict mediator. No matter how difficult the conflict,crisis or situation is, I always remember that is never too late to clear up the past and make a new start.
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