我们的英语作文（高三）。求高手帮忙改一下。帮我看看哪错了，还有哪里不合适，或者有更恰当的句型。
题目：高三伊始，许多家长用金钱、旅游等承诺鼓励孩子学习，考上一所理想的大学。假设你是高三学生李华，请针对这一现象，给某英文报社写封信，陈述你的观点。要点：1、简要陈述这一...
题目：高三伊始，许多家长用金钱、旅游等承诺鼓励孩子学习，考上一所理想的大学。假设你是高三学生李华，请针对这一现象，给某英文报社写封信，陈述你的观点。
要点：1、简要陈述这一现象 2、分析这种现象的负面影响 3、你的建议
Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examination around the corner,many parents promised their children that they would get money or a trip or whatever they want only if they study hard.As far as the parents concerned,it would encourage their children to take great pains to get good grades and go to a well-known university.But every coin has two sies,it also can encourage them to do something worng to get the good grades,for example,cheat.
In my view,this method has effect on your kids,but,whether the effect is positive or negative depends on themselves.My suggestion is that don't give your children any reward unless the succeed in the college entrance examination.In a nutshell,he who laughs last laughs best. 展开
要点：1、简要陈述这一现象 2、分析这种现象的负面影响 3、你的建议
Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examination around the corner,many parents promised their children that they would get money or a trip or whatever they want only if they study hard.As far as the parents concerned,it would encourage their children to take great pains to get good grades and go to a well-known university.But every coin has two sies,it also can encourage them to do something worng to get the good grades,for example,cheat.
In my view,this method has effect on your kids,but,whether the effect is positive or negative depends on themselves.My suggestion is that don't give your children any reward unless the succeed in the college entrance examination.In a nutshell,he who laughs last laughs best. 展开
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题目：高三伊始，许多家长用金钱、旅游等承诺鼓励孩子学习，考上一所理想的大学。假设你是高三学生李华，请针对这一现象，给某英文报社写封信，陈述你的观点。
要点：1、简要陈述这一现象 2、分析这种现象的负面影响 3、你的建议
Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examination around the corner,many parents promised their children that they would get money or a trip or whatever they want only if they study hard.As far as the parents are concerned,promising may encourage their children to take great pains to get good grades and go to a well-known university.But every coin has two sides,it can also encourage them to do something wrong to get the good grades,for example,cheating.
In my view,this method has effect on kids,but,whether the effect is positive or negative depends on kids themselves.My suggestion is that don't give your children any reward unless they succeed in the college entrance examination.In a nutshell,he who laughs last laughs best.
要点：1、简要陈述这一现象 2、分析这种现象的负面影响 3、你的建议
Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examination around the corner,many parents promised their children that they would get money or a trip or whatever they want only if they study hard.As far as the parents are concerned,promising may encourage their children to take great pains to get good grades and go to a well-known university.But every coin has two sides,it can also encourage them to do something wrong to get the good grades,for example,cheating.
In my view,this method has effect on kids,but,whether the effect is positive or negative depends on kids themselves.My suggestion is that don't give your children any reward unless they succeed in the college entrance examination.In a nutshell,he who laughs last laughs best.
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追问
are u sick? F U C K you , D amn you! B i t c h , you will go to the hell!
追答
已修改过了，兄弟！
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Dear parents,
As the college entrance examination is around the corner, many parents allow their children, they will get the money or travel, or whatever they want as long as they work hard. As for the concerns of parents, which will encourage children to try to get good grades, in the famous university. But every coin has a website, it can also encourage them to do what the problem is, achieved good results, for example, to deceive.
In my opinion, this method has the effect on your children, however, whether it is positive or negative effects depend on yourself. My advice is not to give you any compensation unless the child succeed in the college entrance examination. In short, he who laughs last laughs best, who.
亲爱的家长，
随着高考在即，很多父母答应他们的孩子，他们会得到金钱或旅行，或任何他们想要的只要他们努力学习。至于家长的关注，这将鼓励孩子尽力取得好成绩，在知名大学。但每一个硬币有个网站，它也可以鼓励他们做什么问题，取得了好成绩，例如，欺骗。
在我看来，这种方法有影响你的孩子，但是，无论是正面或负面的影响取决于自己。我的建议是不要给你的孩子任何报酬除非在高考中取得成功。简而言之，谁笑到最后，谁笑得最好。
As the college entrance examination is around the corner, many parents allow their children, they will get the money or travel, or whatever they want as long as they work hard. As for the concerns of parents, which will encourage children to try to get good grades, in the famous university. But every coin has a website, it can also encourage them to do what the problem is, achieved good results, for example, to deceive.
In my opinion, this method has the effect on your children, however, whether it is positive or negative effects depend on yourself. My advice is not to give you any compensation unless the child succeed in the college entrance examination. In short, he who laughs last laughs best, who.
亲爱的家长，
随着高考在即，很多父母答应他们的孩子，他们会得到金钱或旅行，或任何他们想要的只要他们努力学习。至于家长的关注，这将鼓励孩子尽力取得好成绩，在知名大学。但每一个硬币有个网站，它也可以鼓励他们做什么问题，取得了好成绩，例如，欺骗。
在我看来，这种方法有影响你的孩子，但是，无论是正面或负面的影响取决于自己。我的建议是不要给你的孩子任何报酬除非在高考中取得成功。简而言之，谁笑到最后，谁笑得最好。
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追问
1 many parents allow their children, they will get the money or travel, or whatever they want as long as they work hard. 2every coin has a website 这些话对吗？ 你这改的是神马啊？根本不通啊？你是小学老师吗？
追答
不是小学老师,我自己写的,这些话是对的.
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