Question

请帮忙翻译这段话，谢谢~

痛苦纠聚心中，眉心发烫发热，胸口郁闷难展，胃里一股气冲喉而上。院长说这孩子发育迟缓时，她更是心头无绪。她在孩子所待的房里来回踱步，这房里还有其他小孩。整个房间只有一扇窗，窗外树影婆娑。就让孩子留下来吧，这里有善心的神父和修女，这里将来会扩充为有医疗作用的看护中心，这是留住孩子最好的地方。这孩子是她的秘密，她将秘密留在这树林掩映的建筑里。

最主要是前面的 “痛苦纠聚心中，眉心发烫发热，胸口郁闷难展，胃里一股气冲喉而上。” 太文学了。。。。

Answer 1

◎ 痛苦纠聚心中，眉心发烫发热，胸口郁闷难展，胃里一股气冲喉而上。

本句描写院长的心情，可以用多种手段翻译——
1、把 “痛苦纠聚心中”作为句子主体，其他意思独立用主格结构作为陪衬性状语。用汉语表述就是“痛苦在院长心中纠结，他的眉心发烫发热，胸口郁闷难展，胃里一股气冲喉而上”。
The principal was in an agony of worry with her brows red hot and burning, unbreathable gloominess in her chest and then a rush of depressed breath coming out to her throat from inside the stomach.
2、把 “痛苦纠聚心中”作为方式状语，“眉心发烫发热，胸口郁闷难展”作为句子主体，“胃里一股气冲喉而上”作为陪衬性状语，即“带着心中纠聚的痛苦，就在胸口郁闷难展时，他眉心发烫发热，此时胃里一股气冲喉而上”：
With an agony of worry snarling in her heart, the principal’s brows appeared red and burning while unbreathable gloominess was in her chest, a rush of depressed breath surging to her throat from inside the stomach.

类似的翻译都可以把原文的文学味道传递出来。

以下是信手翻译的，仅供参考。

◎ 院长说这孩子发育迟缓时，她更是心头无绪。
——When the principal said that the sonny developed slowly, she had no more idea.
◎ 她在孩子所待的房里来回踱步，这房里还有其他小孩。
——She paced up and down in the room where the child staying, in which there were other children.
◎ 整个房间只有一扇窗，窗外树影婆娑。
——There was only one window of the room in whole and the dancing outline of trees could be seen.
◎ 就让孩子留下来吧，这里有善心的神父和修女，这里将来会扩充为有医疗作用的看护中心，这是留住孩子最好的地方。
——Let the child stay behind, and there were the kind priest and the sisters here; it would be enlarged into a nurse center with medical treatment and here would ne the best place to leave him on.
◎ 这孩子是她的秘密，她将秘密留在这树林掩映的建筑里。
——The child was her secret and she would be secretly staying in the building standing among the trees.

追问

谢谢张老师！特别是前面那两种翻译文学句子的方式，感觉蛮不错的~ 不过貌似第一句的应该是修饰小孩的母亲，而非院长的吧。。
“院长说这孩子发育迟缓时，她更是心头无绪。” “她更是.......” 那么前面的一系列描述，说的应该是母亲吧？

She paced up and down in the room where the child staying, in which there were other children.
where the child staying, 请问这里为什么是staying呢？

追答

没太注意“院长说这孩子发育迟缓时，她更是心头无绪”中的“她”并不是指院长，翻译时犯了指代错误，修改如下：
1、She was in an agony of worry with her brows red hot and burning, unbreathable gloominess in her chest and then a rush of depressed breath coming out to her throat from inside the stomach. When the principal said that the sonny developed slowly, she had no more idea.
2、 With an agony of worry snarling in her heart, her brows appeared red and burning while unbreathable gloominess was in her chest, a rush of depressed breath surging to her throat from inside the stomach. When the principal said that the sonny developed slowly, she had no more idea.

由于信手翻译，定语从句 where the child staying 中少打了助动词 was，应该是 where the child was staying。
还有一处打错一个字，应该是 here would be the best place to leave him on（把 be 打成了相邻键 ne）

Answer 2

She felt the pain and anguish intertwining in her heart and surging up to her burning forehead. Her chest tightened with such gloom that rose from her stomach and rushed through her throat.
这里的痛苦也好，发热也好，还是一股气也好，都是指代痛苦的情感。不要局限于字面，把强烈的情感表达出来即可。

Answer 3

The pain by poly heart, holding the hot heat, chest depressed to the exhibition, a furious throat and stomach. The dean says the child growth retardation, she is the heart of thread. Her child has been pacing around the house, the room and the other children. The room has a window, the window shady. Let the children stay, here are the good priests and nuns, here in the future will expand to the role of medical care center, this is the best place to keep the child. The child was her secret, she would stay in the woods with the secret of buildings.The most important is in front of the" correct heart pain together, holding the hot heat, chest depressed to the exhibition, a furious throat and stomach." Too literary....

Answer 4

It was anguished in mind, hot to burn in head and choked to breathe in chest as a sudden air out of stomach right up to her throat. She became more worried and tangled when the doctor told her that her child had a problem of growth retard. She was pacing in the room, swing shadows of trees, with only one window where her kid and others stayed. It is the best place to keep the kid because there are good-minded priest and nuns and a medical nursing centre which will be developed in due time. The kid is her secret that she will keep and leave it in the complex in the covering of trees

Answer 5

晕啊！这是专8的考题？难怪如今大学生到了公司里连话都说不利落！就是这样被摧残出来的。

追问

呵呵 其实还有各种更变态的考试呢。。。 大学生里面伶牙俐齿 铁齿铜牙的 也不少呢~

追答

另：老汉多几句嘴： LZ 如果是为了应付变态考试，那你啃这类变态考题实属无奈，上帝也帮不了你。但是如果你是为了学习今后工作中需要的英语应用能力、翻译能力，那我劝你趁早把这些题扔了、把那些“英美文学名著”全从窗口扔出去吧。稍稍打听一下你师兄师姐的就业情况，你一定会发现：即便英语专业毕业生，今后用英语作为“专业”来谋生的，还是少数，文学翻译吃饭的，更是一万个里未必找出一个。绝大多数人工作后都把英语作为工具（仅此而已），而靠法律、金融、财会、进出口。。。。吃饭。我以前教过的千把个英语专业本科生、专科生，如今拿英语作为饭碗的人极少（包括教师）。所以在学校里学英语时，短期要专 ----- 几个星期内只盯着一个专题，比如股市、产品“包装”上市、social media 公司的成败。。。； 长期要“杂”----- 什么都看、哪类语汇都懂一些、无论是讨论时装做菜还是解释太阳能运作原理，你都能拿英语来与人周旋一番。与“生动形容林妹妹寻愁觅怨表情”的“能力相比”，哪个更可能今后让你吃饱饭、吃好饭？

追问

谢谢您的建议，我蛮同意您后面所说的，确实现在很多人工作后都把英语作为工具，而不是作为谋生的唯一手段，现在需要的是复合型人才。 不过我觉得，既然是存在的东西，都有其合理的价值。虽然在真正的工作，生活当中，英语的实际口语能力以及个人知识面的广阔，更为重要。但是我觉得这些文学性的东西，还是有其价值所在吧。我不是英语专业的学生，不过正如您所的， 各方面的知识都可以去涉猎一下，虽然这类过于文学的（下接评论）