Question

求英语课前小演讲。。。不要笑话。。也就3分钟就行，，搞笑点的。。。

Answer 1

Teacher: Johnny, why are you late for school every morning?
Johnny: Every time I come to the corner, a guidepost（路牌，路标） says, 'School -- Go Slow'
老师：约翰，为什么你每天早上都迟到呢？
约翰：每次我走到街角的时候，都有一块路牌写着：“学校-小心慢行”

追问

我想要的是大学的课前演讲。。。笑话老师不让说，谢谢

追答

哦
The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.

Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."

【译文】

老猫

一位老妇有只猫，这只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了东西，因为它年纪太大了。一天，老猫发现一只老鼠，它跳过去抓这只老鼠，然而，它咬不住这只老鼠。因此，老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了，因为老猫咬不了它。

于是，老妇很生气，因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫，猫说：“不要打你的老仆人，我已经为你服务了很多年，而且还愿意为你效劳，但是，我实在太老了，对年纪大的不要这么无情，要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”

Answer 2

去做个简单的ppt关于gester的或者找一些娱乐的新闻或图片用英文讲几句就ok 我们演讲的话都是做个小ppt什么的

Answer 3

笑话跟搞笑差不多哦

追问

但是大学老师不让讲笑话呢