Question

地道英语高手谁能帮忙润色一下我的简短自我介绍？内容如下。此自我介绍对我非常重要！感激不尽！

以下是需要润色成地道英语的自我介绍内容：
Good morning teachers. My name is Wang Min, I come from the 85th seven-year system. I’m honored to do a brief self-introduction. In the College Sixth Level English Test, I got 564 points, the same year I also passed the National Second Level Computer Examination. In December of last year, I published an article in the journal called clinical oncology and cancer research as the first author. The title of the article is Intussusception induced by Transverse colon lipoma in a young male patient. I have several hobbies such as singing and basketball, and I have participated in many competitions and has won numerous awards. During my clinical practice in the department of oncology, not only that I have accumulated a wealth of medical knowledge, and also enabled me to gradually establish a correct idea of a good doctor. Thanks to my alma mater and each teacher. The above is my self-introduction. Thank you very much.

以下是自我介绍的中文版，供各位高手参考。谢谢！
尊敬的各位老师上午好。我叫王敏，来自85期七年制。我在大学英语六级考试中取得564分，同年我还通过了国家计算机二级考试。在2011年12月，我作为第一作者在clinical oncology and cancer research上发表了一篇文章，题目是Intussusception induced by transverse colon lipoma in a young male patient。我的业余爱好有唱歌，篮球等等，我曾多次参加文体活动并多次获奖。在肿瘤科的临床实习中，不仅使我积累了丰富的医学知识，也使我逐步建立起一种如何做好医生的正确理念。感谢我的母校以及每位老师。以上是我的自我介绍。谢谢。

Answer 1

您好~在给英文介绍的意见之前，我想知道这是作为什么的自我介绍？是答辩吗？如果是工作答辩的话，我觉得英语能力可以放到最后介绍，放在第一句话会喧宾夺主。当然，业余爱好等最好也放在最后说。

我觉得结构最好是，自我姓名，学历等介绍-------->发表的专业文章---------->临床实习----------->英文优势---------->业余爱好。

Good Morning distinguished professors(ladies and gentlemen), thank you for attending this presentation. My name is Wang Min, I have graduate from 85th seven-year (本科：undergraduate, 硕士：postgraduate,博士:PhD) program of ( 大学名字 )University. I am major at (专业名称). Last December, I have published an article called 'Intussusception induced by Transverse colon lipoma in a young male patient' on the Clinical Oncology and Cancer Research Journal as the first author. I have accumulated a wealth of medical knowledge as well as built the right idea of being a good doctor during the clinical practice in the department of oncology in the (医院名称) hospital.

Apart from my academic and professional ability, I also have English language advantages, in the College Sixth Level English Test I have got 564 marks. Besides, I have passed the Second Level of National Computer Examination as well. For hobbies, I love singing and playing basketball. Moreover, I have attended many relevant competitions and won the awards (numerous不太适合形容获奖，有点夸张).

This is my brief introduction, thanks to my beloved (母校名字)，and everyone attending this presentation today. Thank you!

Answer 2

Good morning , ladies and gentlemen!
My name is Wang Min, a student of the 85th seven-year system. I feel great honored to have been given this opportunity to be standing here doing a brief self-introduction to myself.
I am a hardworking boy, who got 564 pointswho In the College Sixth Level English Test. At the same year I passed the National Second Level Computer Examination,too. In December last year, as the first author, I published an article in the journal called clinical oncology and cancer research . The title of the article is Intussusception induced by Transverse colon lipoma in a young male patient. In my spare time, I like singing and playing basketball, and I have participated in many physical and art competitions and has won numerous awards. During my clinical practice in the department of oncology, not only have I accumulated a wealth of medical knowledge, but also I have gradually established a correct idea of a good doctor.
In the past few years, I have made some progress in my study. But I should say I owe all my achievements and progress to my teachers. Without them, I couldn't have grown up so quickly. This is my self-introduction. Thank you very much for listening.