Question

谁能帮我改下这篇英语作文的语法和用词，越快越好，谢谢，PS：括号里的可无视

Bill Gates, a well-known name over the world, he had an extraordinary life. First of all, he born into an extremely successful family. His dad worked as a lawyer for the Seattle law firm of Skeel, and his mom served on numerous corporate boards, including the United Way, the University of Washington, and First Interstate Bancorp (Dickinson 10). “Trey” was a special name of Bill’s being called by his family (Dickinson 11). Bill showed independence at a very early age; but there is one thing he loved just like other kids, the rocking horse, he can ride it for hours (Dickinson 11). When he was nine, he read the World Book Encyclopedia from A to Z just for fun, he was so far ahead of the other students because as a kid, he could already understand the high level of reading encyclopedias (Dickinson 12). In 1967, Bill started junior high school at the Lakeside School, it’s an all-boys private school, which is also a good setting for the very smart boy like Bill who got bored easily, and this school changed Bill’s life (Dickinson 13). In 1968, Bill had his first introduction to computers; It was an ASR-33 Teletype machine which was a PDP-10 microcomputer that was roughly the size of a refrigerator (Dickinson 15). From then on, Bill was totally into computers. Ann Winblad said: “Bill is a ’12-year-old Boy Scout’ who is always saying ‘where’s the adventure? Where are we hiking to? Where are we marching to? What happens next?” (Aronson 36), he was curious in every fresh event. There was a guy named Paul Allen, he was 2 years older than Bill who was interested in the hardware, where Bill focused on software, they spent much of the time discussing about the computer (Dickinson 17). In 1973, Bill went to the Harvard university, and 2 years later, In Jan, 1975, a microcomputer called the MITS Altair 8800 appeared on the cover of Popular Electronics magazine and that drew attention from Bill and Paul, the computer was a box with a series of toggle switches and lights on the front, but had no monitor or keyboard (Dickinson 24-5). Bill put all his energy into the computers, so he dropped out of Harvard at the start of 1977 (Dickinson 31). After all these efforts done by Bill, he created Microsoft and became a billionaire. Even though, he was known to eat simple lunches like pizza or canned spaghetti, and dressed casual like the civilians (Dickinson 69). Bill married his 29-year-old wife, Melinda French, on New Year’s Day in 1994, and they had three children (Dickinson 72). Furthermore, Bill was very easy going on the dress code of his employees, they can wear mostly jeans and T-shirts, and there has been a a special room just for them to juggle around (Dickinson 51). Overall, Bill Gates’s life cannot be a miracle without his hard-core workings.

Answer 1

写的很不错啊，要求不是太高的话，用下英文纠错软件易改就差不多了吧。
以下是易改找出来的问题：
1. discussing about，about多余了。如果有问题你可以自行google "discussing about" + "redundant"，有很多说明为什么要去掉
2. dressed casual应该用casually
3. as been a a special room 多了一个a