Question

请英语高手帮我点评一下我的翻译，有什么不对的地方请指出并改正，如果某句子有更好的翻译请告诉我，谢谢

中文：
作品简要说明
采用公交代步是一种绿色出行方式，可以很好地做到节约能源，减少污染，我主要是研究东苑小区附近路段公交的路线的问题，在作品中对公交路线的合理性做出评价，就不足之处谈谈我认为可行的解决办法和提出一些关于公交的小知识等。作品的地图画的是东苑小区附近路段的交通路线，根据图上的建筑物和我多日调查而拍下的照片可以大概了解到这些路段公交分布的特点等信息，为了符合“绿色出行”的概念，地图的底色我选择了绿色。
我的翻译：
Using bus to go out is a kind of “Green Travel”, which can save energy and reduce pollution. I mainly study the problem of the bus route of Dong Yuan district’ nearby roads. In my works, I make the evaluation of the rationality of the bus routes, I wrote down my opinion on the inadequacies of the bus routes and I proposed some knowledge on the bus. I drew the map of bus routes of Dong Yuan district’ nearby roads, and according to the buildings on the map and the pictures that I have took after doing some research, we can probably know characteristics of the distribution of these sections of bus information. In order to comply with the concept of “Green Travel”, the background color I chose the green.

Answer 1

我还是把修改的全文写了，供你参考
taking bus is a environmental way, which saves energy and reduces pollution.
my research was mainly focused on the bus routes nearby dongyuan district(这个地方，district是一种行政区划，如果表达的是住宅小区建议用garden), to evaluate the rationality of the bus routes, and to propose the solution to the unrational part and, also, some knowledge on public transportation.
the map is for the bus routes mentioned above(避免重复用语), and we can learn some information, such as the characteristics of the bus routes, according to the buildings on the map and the pictures that I have took during my research.
In order to match the concept of “Green Travel”, (the background color I chose) is green.
括号中是一个整体，作为主语，后面系动词+宾语

Answer 2

1.It is a Green Way that going out by bus, which can save energy and reduce pollution.
2.problem 改为 condition
3.roads去掉
4.works是著作，改为paper
5.I wrote 改为 writting
6.I proposed 改为 putting forward some tips about transit.
7.the map 改为 a map
8.roads去掉，后改句号，and去掉。
9.pictures 后改为taken in my research,
10. probably改为generally

11.know 改为 understand the characteristics of bus distribution around these roads
12.最后一句改为：At last, I take green as the background color of my map to accord with the concept of “Green Travel”.

边看边手打，希望能有所帮助，请采纳。

追问

4.works貌似有作品的意思吧5.是writing吧6.transit有公交的意思吗?

追答

works 多用于著作作品
writing是笔误
transit 意思是公共交通

边看边打了20分钟，可惜你采纳的是其他人的。

追问

不好意思啊....我本来也想把你的采用的...可是我不知道只能采用一个....不好意思啊.....

追答

呵呵，没事的，对你有帮助就好。

Answer 3

建议作品改为论文，paper.

绿色出行用Green transportation

Using public transportation is a kind of Green way which can reduce pollution and save energy consumption. My major work is to study the problem of existing bus routes in the vicinity of Dongyuan residential area and assess the rationality of designing of current bus routes...

Answer 4

困死啦，还是坚持看完啦，其实你翻译的挺地道的，长句用的也比较准确，赞啦！！