Question

你知道哪些英语冷笑话?

Answer 1

Improvement
One student to another: "How are your English lessons coming along?" "Fine. I used to be one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me."
进步
一位学生对另一位说：“你的 英语 最近学的怎么样?”
“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。”
Half or Five Tenths?
Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths? Gerald: I'd much rather have the half. Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.
Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths. 半个还是十分之五
老师：你愿意要半个柑橘，还是十分之五个柑橘? 杰拉得：我宁可要半个。 老师：仔细想想，说出理由来。
杰拉得：因为你如果把柑橘切成十分之五，那柑橘汁就损失太多了。
To Go to Heaven
Sunday School teacher: Hands up all those who want to go to Heaven? Hands up ..... what about you, Terry? You haven't got your hand up -- don't you want to go to Heaven?
Terry: I can't. My Mum told me to go straight home.
去天堂
主日学校的教员：想去天堂的人举起手来，把手举起来。。。你呢，哈里?你还没举手呢-- 你不想去天堂吗?
哈里： 我去不了，因为妈妈让我一放学就回家。
How Many Rabbits?
Teacher: Now, Jonathan, if I gave you three rabbits and then the next day I gave you five rabbits, how many rabbits would you have? Jonathan: Nine, sir. Teacher: Nine?
Jonathan: I've got one already, sir.
多少只兔子?
老师：好，乔纳森，假如我给你三只兔子，第二天我又给你五只，你一共有多少只兔子?
乔纳森：一共有九只，先生。 老师：九只?
乔纳森：先生，我本来就有一只。