经典英语话剧剧本
经典英语话剧剧本 （一）
演员表：
西门吹雪
叶孤城
花满楼
king
旁白
道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠
旁白：A quiet villageiscoveredwithwhitesnow .
Birdsaredancinginthecold .
Amaniswalkingalongthestreet ,stepbystep .
Windiscominginsilence.
Another mysteriousmanapproaches .
Y与X相遇。
X:oH ,Iamsorrytoknockyou !
Y:Haha, Nevermindbaybay.
X:Excuseme, whoareyouonearth? couldyoutellmeyourname?
Y:ha ha ,Iwon’tchangemyname! nomatterwhathappens. I’mthemostfamous-------YeGucheng. Whoareyou?
X:Iamximenchuixue.
Y惊讶：Ar, ximenchui xue?
X:Yes,whatiswrong?
Y:IheardthatyouarethebestingMartialArts?
X:Great, youknowme !
Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’tkillme! letmeyougo!
X:No, Imustkillyou !
Y:Idon''''''''''''''''twanttobekilled.Thereare aeighty-year-oldmotheandathree-yearold sontobelookedafterbyme!
X:Noway! Becausewearefightingnow!youknow?
Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don''''''''''''''''t forceme!
X:Pardon!
（Y拿出一袋牛奶）
X抢过牛奶：milk, verygood! Ilikedrinkingit. howdoyouknowthat?
Y:pleasedrinkit!
X喝完牛奶：Thanks, ha,ha
Y:Doyoustillwanttokillme?
X:Sure, must! milkismilk.
孝指者 Y（恼怒+冷酷）：Verygood! verygood! Ihopeyouwillnotforgetwhatyousaid!?
X:I’msureIwon’t!
Y:Imustgiveyoualesson!IfIdon''''''''''''''''tbeatyourthistime, you’llneverbehaveproperly!3-2-1-0!
X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !
Y大笑：HaHa……
X可怜状： help! help! Whereisthewashroom?
Y:What ?
X:Toliet?
Y:What ?
X:The "WC"?
Y:Oh,I see ,goalongthisstreetandturnrightwhenyouseeacorssingroad!
X:Thanks,byebye.
Y掏出逗拦纸屑吹巧薯：Thisisgenuirnesnow!
H:Stop!Protectingtheenvironmentisabasicobligation!
Y:Whoareyou?
H:Hua---man----lou! Haveyouseenximenchuixue?
Y:Yes, hewasbeatenbymeandisin"WC" now,ha……
H惊讶：Nowyouarethebestintheworld!
Y:Youareright!
H:Teriffic!youaretheonemykinglookingfor! doyouwantjoininus?
Y:Yes,It’sverygood.
H:Ok, followme, Let’sgotoseemyking!
Y:Ok,Let’s go!
第二幕：无间道
H:Mydearest ! letmeintroduce yeguchengtoyou! （指Y） thisisyegucheng.
K:sitdownplese, yegucheng.
H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状：Yegucheng! Doyouwanttofollowmykingnomatterwhathappenssuchascold headache,sair and aids?
Y: Yes,Ido.
K: Huamanlou, come . puttheringonhisfinger!（音乐停）
X唱着上：Onlyyou……（看到戒子） thisringshouldbemine!
K:Butwhoareyou? whyshoulditbelongyou?
Y急切： king! dearking!Imustgonow,mybrotherislookingforme!huoxi（维语再见）
K:huoxi? Whatdoesthatmean? ItisnotEnglish, isn’t it ?
Y:How clever……
X冷酷：yegucheng! comehere!Iwanttotellyousomething!
Y抱X的腿：oldbrother ! Forgiveme!
X:Forgiveme? Why?
Y: Oncetherewasachangebeforeme,Ilostit. Ifthegodgivemeantherchance, I’lltellyou"I love you",Iftheremustbea limited period,Ihopeitisthousandyear!
X:Youshall cheat me!all you did are wrong!how can youtell thelady’s"WC"!
Y:Ilikegoinglady’s WC .I……I……IthinkthatyoulikewhatIlike.（Y又拿出一袋牛奶）
X: m-i-l-k?haha, ayixidailu!（我爱你的意思）
K: ayixidailu?What’sthemeaning? whyIalsocan’tunderstandyou?
X:Youarestupid! Itmeans"I love you".
K:Don’t saythat"you love me". I’llkillyouforyousayingdirtywordtome!
X:What? （侧耳装着听不到） You---kill----me?come, come…（X上去抓住K）
K:Fuckyou. Imustkillyou!
X:Howcanyoukillme? haha……
Y:Letmehaveatry! 3-2-1-0（X捂着肚子，蹲下）
K: thankyouverymuch, yousaveme. Now, I’llgiveyoutheticketforAmericantoletyou
haveavacation.
Y:That’s good. butthereisonemorething. canyougivemea MM ?IwanttogoAmericanwithher.
K:ofcouse.Youaretheonewhohasthesimilartastewithme! Hahaha……小品剧本大全 www.coffbar.com
Y:Hahaha-----
H:Where’ssomewhere?
K:What?
Y:Doyouwanttogolady’s"WC"?
X:Yes,I……I…… do.
H顶着摇头：X,no, no, youcan’tgotoLady’s "WC". Thatisnottheplacewhereyoucangointo ! becauseyouareX ! youarethe bestmanofChinesekongfu!
X: whatifI’mthebestintheword? !whyItrymybesttolivebutI’mstillsomiserable ? whencanIgetmyfreedom? mustbethedeadday ? !
K: youareright. onewillnotbecleveruntilthedayhedie. Inthatcase ,whywill you die in such a bad sorrow way !gointo theLady’s WC , thendie , comfortablly ! goahead !
H: you , stupid , bad behavior ! goaway !
K; why ? whydoyouhelphim ! whoacturallyareyou ?
H: myreal name isLuXiaofeng------the wifeofX .I’maspy.
K惊讶： !you---you---YouareLuXiaofeng ? X’wife ?
Y: Ihavealreadyrecognizedyou . atricker ! doyouknow, youarethefirst person who cheated me ! because of you ,Ideeide never believe anyone else ,including myself .you have destroyed my looking for you for many years ,just for today ! （轻声说）Xwilldie ,goandseehim ,please .
H扑倒在X的身边：X,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope inthe fature and tomorrow is a goodbeginning !
K:what amoving story !I was impressed !
Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !
H: life isa progress ,and it is delight that itneedn’t resume !
（H忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，K吓跑。音乐《再见，警察》起）
Y痛苦状：don’tleave me here , you know I love you and I have nothing except you now ,please notabandon me !realizethat I’m wrong .help me,I intend to be back ,helpme ,I keyyou ,beg you------help me . I’ll never dothat again !（Y死，音乐停）
（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）
H: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .
X:gohome ! ?
H:Tomorrow is another day !evenyou have thelast secondto live,youshould be alive ,not only for me , but for ourlove !
X:doyouwant melivealifeinsuchasorrow way ? ok , ok , Ipromise I willbealive for you .but !youknow, Ihavenot timeleft ,but you have ,promisethatyou will be happy everyday !Youmustdome this honor… promise meyou will survive… that youwillnevergiveup… nomatter what happens… no matter howhopeless… promise me now ,andnever let go of that promise.
H: I promise .
X:Never let go .
H:Ipromise . Iwill never let go ,
X.I''''''''ll never letgo.（X死）
H:be alive !yeah , bealive ! bealivewithout ahendance !lifecanbechanceliketimecangotoback . thereisbeatifulsnowbutinsping , solifecancomefromthebeginning ! （H自刎，艰难的爬到X身边死。音乐停。）
经典英语话剧剧本 （二）
旁白：It’s a cold evening. The Titanic has sunken. Rose, Jack and Oscar are on the life boat floating in the ocean. This is Jack. This is Rose and this is Oscar, her husband-to-be.（边说边介绍，三人坐在课桌上）
Oscar: Oh, honey~ Are you OK? （边说边将手搭上Rose肩）
Jack: She is my girl.（打开Oscar的.手）
Oscar: You are so cold.（脱下报纸披在R身上面向观众）what you wear, what you are.
Jack: What are you doing! （扔掉校服，脱下自己的羽绒服抖了抖，面向观众）BoSideng（波斯登）， warm and comfortable, it’s my choice.（将羽绒服披在Rose身上）
Rose:（向Jack）I love you.（向观众）But I love BoSideng more.
Oscar: Hey! She is my wife-to-be, who are you?
Jack: I am I. Wo de di pan wo zuo zhu（我的地盘我做主）。
Oscar: People on the Earth all know, She, and I, will go to New York to have our wedding. Rose: But now……
Jack: Don’t say any more! Take your knife out! （从口袋里掏出铅笔，紧握手中）
Oscar: Ok. Let’s go fighting! （同样掏出铅笔紧握手中）
Jack & Oscar: Fighting! （用铅笔互戳）----小蜜蜂~
Rose: No, no, no! Please stop! （拉二人）（ J & O不小心将Rose推下桌子——落水）
Rose: Help, help!（Jack & Oscar将拉上Rose桌子）
Oscar: Honey, how are you?
Rose:（向观众）PiaoRou（飘柔）， just so confident~（甩头发）
（Rose不小心推Oscar,Oscar落水） Oscar: Help, help!
Rose: Oh, no! （向Oscar伸手）（Jack抓过Rose的手，对视）
Jack:（唱）你是我的玫瑰，你是我的花…You are my life, you are my honey~
Rose: But……what about Oscar?
Jack: Don’t pay attention to him.
Rose: OK. Darling~ I love you, loving you, like mouse love rice~
旁白：At this time, Oscar has been far away……Jack and Rose are still floating in the ocean. It’s colder and colder.
Jack: Do you feel cold?
Rose: Yes. You see we are so lonely.
Jack: Don’t worry. I have this! （从口袋里掏出打火机，并向观众展示）This is a magic DaHuoji（打火机）。（Jack按下打火机）（Superwoman上，胸前贴一张纸，上书S）
Superwoman:（向观众）Do you know who am I? I am Superwoman! The famous Superman is my brother. I’m willing to help others.
Rose: Would you please help us get away from here?（Superwoman无视，面向Jack）
Superwoman: Oh, pretty boy~ Come here, I will save you.
Jack: Take my girl together.
Superwoman: No way!（Superwoman下）（Jack第二次按下打火机）
（Indian Princess上，向观众合掌问候）
Princess: I am a princess from India.
Rose: Would you please help us get away from here?
Princess: OK. I have a magic blanket, maybe it can take you away. Come on.（从口袋里掏出围巾）（Jack & Rose 尝试伸出脚，Princess上下晃动围巾）
Princess: Oh, no, it’s broken! My blanket! （边说边后退，渐远）
（Indian Princess下）（Jack第三次还没按，Harry Potter上，提着扫帚）
Harry: Yi? Where am I? （向观众）My name is Harry Potter. I’m from Hogwarts（霍格沃茨）。 I lose my way.
Rose: Would you please help us get away from here?
Harry: I really want to help you, but my ability is limited.（耸肩）
Jack:（愤怒地）Oh, my god! Go away at once! （指向前方）（Harry Potter下）
旁白：Suddenly, the life boat is shaking because Jack and Rose are too heavy.
Jack: Rose, listen to me. I love you, but I will leave you.The boat can’t support us for
a long time. You must live, so I will jump into the sea.
Rose: No, no, no. Jump or not jump, this is a question.
Jack: Then let the God decide it（二人低头虔诚祈祷状）
Rose: God will bless us.（Jack和Rose同时从身后伸出手来，包剪锤）
Jack & Rose: One two three!（Jack出锤子，Rose出包子）
Jack: I lose. You see, it’s God’s choice.（Rose连连摇头）
Rose: Oh, no. Jack, Jack, why your name is Jack!
Jack: I wish you a happy life. Good-bye!（Jack跳下桌子，Rose伸手拉，未果）
Rose: You jump, I jump.（Rose跳下桌子，O未死， 继续叫救命……）
（旁白唱my heart will go on,音乐起，全剧终。Jack & Rose跳舞，张开手臂经典动作作结。）。
