Question

汉译英翻译 ，以下请找出英文的错误或不当处并更正， 英文最后要给老外看，请大侠帮忙。不要机器翻译

与业务并行，保障企业安全

2012年新事业部成立后，各部门业务逐渐由单一模式向综合模式演变，新的风险也随之而生且呈现出多样化。

为了健全和强化新事业部信息安全管理体系，确保信息安全工作在各事业部得到有效推进与落实，信息安全部对新事业部信息安全责任人和专员进行了任命，并纳入公司的信息安全运作体系。

面对业务变化和业务风险的变化，信息安全部及时采取相应的控制措施，完善信息安全体系建设，在保护业务发展的同时，有效提高了公司整体信息安全水平。

公司大部分的核心信息资产以电子文档的形式存在，在网络互联互通的时代加速了信息化进程，同时也将公司的敏感信息置于风险当中。

为保护公司研发部门的机密数据和敏感信息免于恶意或者意外的泄露，信息工程部进一步对公司电子信息加强了保护措施，正在进行的DPS优化项目，将进一步优化DPS服务器性能，提升DPS客户端工作效率。
Guaranteeenterprise security while expanding business

With the BU was established in 2012, the business have gradually evolved from single
mode to integrated mode, and the new risk have appeared and presented multiple
trend.

We have appointed security sponsors and Specialists as part of the company’s ISMS
in each BU to improve and strengthen the new business unit’s information
security work, and ensure which has an effective promotion and implementation.

When faced the changes and risks, we token appropriate controls to evolvement the
ISMS construction. These not only improve the overall level of the ISMS but
also protecting the business development.

Most of company’s core information assets are exits in the form of electronic
document. The networks interconnect have promoted the speed of information
process and put the company's sensitive information at risk.

Answer 1

Guarantee enterprise security alongwith business expansion

while expanding business 改为 alongwith business expansion

With the new BU was established in 2012, the business have gradually evolved from single
to integrated mode, and new risks appeared with multiple trends.
new BU, risk 应该用复数， have appeared 改为 appeared with multiple trends, 或者用various

We have appointed security sponsors and Specialists as part of the company’s ISMS
in each BU to improve and strengthen the new business unit’s information
security work, and to ensure an effective promotion and implementation.
ensure which has 改为 to ensure 前后一致

When faced the changes and risks, we token appropriate controls to evolvement the
ISMS construction. These not only improve the overall level of the ISMS but
also protecting the business development.
FACED, 改为 facing , token 改为 taken, to evolvement 改为

Most of company’s core information assets are exits in the form of electronic
document. The networks interconnect have promoted the speed of information
process and put the company's sensitive information at risk.
are exits 改为 exist in electronic form, The networks interconnect have promoted the speed of information,改为 the interconnecting networks have accelerated the information processing speed, but meanwhile it also puts company's sensitive information at risk.
为保护公司研发部门的机密数据和敏感信息免于恶意或者意外的泄露，信息工程部进一步对公司电子信息加强了保护措施，正在进行的DPS优化项目，将进一步优化DPS服务器性能，提升DPS客户端工作效率。
In order to protect R&D department's confidential data and sensitive information from deliberate or accidental leakage, IT department has take appropriate measures to strengthen the protection machanism. the current ongoing task is the DPS optimization project, the project will optimize the performance of DPS servers and improve the DPS efficience.

个人意见，供参考, 最后一段，没有，我加 的。

Answer 2

And business parallel, the safety in 2012 after the establishment of the new Department, the Department of business gradually from a single model to the integrated schema evolution, new risks also arise and diversified. In order to improve and strengthen the new Department of information security management system, to ensure the information security effectively promote and implement in each department, information security were appointed to the new Department of information security and the responsibility of specialist, and incorporated into the information security operation system of the company. Facing the change of business change and business risk, the information security department timely take corresponding control measures, improve the construction of information security system, in the protection of business development at the same time, effectively improve the company's overall information security level. Most of the company's core asset information exists in the form of electronic documents, in the era of network interconnection to accelerate the process of informatization, but also sensitive company information at risk. The R & D department for confidential data protection company and sensitive information from leaking malicious or accidental, information engineering department to the company further strengthen the protection of electronic information, the DPS project optimization is carried out, will further optimize the DPS server performance, enhance the work efficiency of the DPS client.