Question

请英语老师们帮忙修改一下我写的作文

书面表达
假如你是班长，请你用英语通知你班同学本周星期六晚上7；30在本班举行一次英语晚会，节目有唱歌，朗诵。讲故事。话剧等。要求本班同学都参加，欢迎外班同学光临，请同学们做好准备，词数80左右
Notice
I'm very glad to tell you that we will hold an English party in our class at 7;30 on satuday this week 。everyone including foreign students is requied to attend 。The program included singing songs、reciting、telling story、stage playing and so on。Everyone is requied to be present on time。
5：30（发出通知的时间自己编的） class
漏了个结束语 That's all .Thank you..

Answer 1

回答还差十来个单词，这样的话，你可以加些内容。Notice
Boys and girls, please pay attentinon.
I'm very glad to tell you that we will hold an English party in our class at 7:30 on Saturday.Everyone is requied to attend ，menwhile, other classtmates are also welcomed to jion with us.There'll be rich program ,such as singing songs、reciting、telling story、stage playing and so on.Everyone is requied to get ready for it and be present before 5:30pm.We're waiting for your coming.
That's all. Thank you.

Answer 2

Notice
I am glad to inform that an English party will be hold in our class on 7:30 Saturday this week. Every student in our class should join it and those in other classes are welcomed as well. singing, recitation, storytelling, stage playing are parts of the program. Please be ready for it.

class monitor
时间
书面表达不可以用类似 i'm 的缩写
少量语法错误，如 will hold 应该是will held
大致上问题不大

Answer 3

Notice
I'm very glad to inform you that there will be an English party in our classroom at 7:30 this saturday evening。All of our classmates are required to attend. The students of other classes are also welcome. The planned program of party includes songs singing, reciting, stories telling and stage plays showing etc. Hope everyone to prepare well prioritily and keep in mind to present on time.
5：30（发出通知的时间自己编的） class

Answer 4

Notice
Attention please! An English show of our class will be held at 7:30 this satuday evening. programs will include singing songs、reciting、telling story、stage playing and so on. everyone of our class is required to paticipate and also welcome students from other class visit. wish you well prepared that time.
Class committee
时间可写可不写

Answer 5

included改为includes

若有疑问及时追问，满意敬请采纳，O(∩_∩)O谢谢~~

追问

嗯。。还有么？？我总觉得还有一些错误。读的不太通顺。。而且。。字数没有达标

追答

on satuday this week 可以改为 this Saturday, 就可以翻译为，本周六。 注意单词拼写。
foreith students 前加the.
attend后加it.
最后一句可改为 Everyone is required to be present on time and should prepare for it.
因为题目中有提到 要同学们准备好

追问

foreith students前要加the？？不是特指啊。。

追答

噢，我自己读起来觉得要加。
加不加无大碍。。

追问

老师。。字数没达标咋办呢？我才50多个字。。可是上面说词数80个字左右

追答

我修改下
请你用英语通知你班同学本周星期六晚上7；30在本班举行一次英语晚会，节目有唱歌，朗诵。讲故事。话剧等。要求本班同学都参加，欢迎外班同学光临，请同学们做好准备
I'm very glad to inform you that an English party which includs singing songs、reciting、telling story、stage playing and so on will be held in our class at 7;30 this Saturday. Everyone in our class is requied to attend it on time. Pls prepare for it.
Meanwhile, students from other classes are also welcome to join us.
You can directly contact me for entering for the party.
Wish you all will have a great performance.