各位英语 大神 帮忙看看 我写的一段英文文章 有没有语法错误,如果有表达上的不好也请给予指点。

WethinkthatsomekindsofbehaviorsinWhiteDayorValentineDayarenothelpfulforourfriendship.... We think that some kinds of behaviors in White Day or Valentine Day are not helpful for our friendship.
When I was a primary student, there was a friend of mine, he just gave peperos to the friends who were tall. So the friends who were short were very angry, and a great deal of trouble had arisen between the friends who were tall and the friends who were short. The friends who didn’t receive the gift would be very sad, and they would hate the people who didn’t give them gift.
And I think we don’t need use the gift to show our true friendship to our friends. We can use the expression of eyes or look of face to show our thinking or feeling to our friends.
On Pepero Day it is not just giving friendship and receiving friendship. People will buy so many peperos. People use this way which is giving and receiving gift to develop friendship, certainly this way is a waste of money. Maybe by giving gift will make someone happy but it is just for a short-time not for ever.
展开
SINOBBC
2013-05-10 · TA获得超过1119个赞
知道小有建树答主
回答量:629
采纳率:50%
帮助的人:501万
展开全部
帮楼主改了一下,意见如下,希望对你会有帮助。

1. some kinds of behaviors 改为 some behaviors;
2. in White Day 改为 on White Day;
3. are not helpful for建议改为are harmful to;
4. primary student 改为 primary school student;
5. When I was a primary student, there was a friend of mine, he just gave peperos to the friends who were tall. 这句从语法上来讲是错误的,有两套主谓关系。建议改为When I was a primary school student, a friend of mine just gave peperos to the friends who were tall.
6. a great deal of trouble 建议改为plenty of troubles;
7. between the friends who were tall and the friends who were short 较为啰嗦,建议改为 between tall and short friends;
8. And I think we don’t need use the gift to show our true friendship to our friends. “And I think we don’t need” 这个表达相当累赘,而且更像是把中文直译过来,不符合英文表达习惯。英文里通常会说I don't think we need...建议改为In my opinion, we don't need show our true friendship to our friends via gift.
9. On Pepero Day it is not just giving friendship and receiving friendship.建议改为Pepero Day is not just about giving and receiving friendship.
10. People use this way which is giving and receiving gift to develop friendship, certainly this way is a waste of money.这句话又是两个主谓关系,即people use和way is。建议改为,It is certainly a waste of money by giving and receiving gift to develop friendship.
11. 结尾Maybe by giving gift will make someone happy but it is just for a short-time not for ever.中的Maybe会弱化作者的观点,显得自己也在怀疑自己的样子,建议去掉。整句建议改为Sending gift will probably make someone happy for a while but the happiness won't last forever.
jlt20120617
2013-05-09 · 超过13用户采纳过TA的回答
知道答主
回答量:61
采纳率:0%
帮助的人:39.7万
展开全部
语法错误太多,改不了了,重写吧
追问
能具体指出几个吗?我好重写!!多谢!!!
已赞过 已踩过<
你对这个回答的评价是?
评论 收起
推荐律师服务: 若未解决您的问题,请您详细描述您的问题,通过百度律临进行免费专业咨询

为你推荐:

下载百度知道APP,抢鲜体验
使用百度知道APP,立即抢鲜体验。你的手机镜头里或许有别人想知道的答案。
扫描二维码下载
×

类别

我们会通过消息、邮箱等方式尽快将举报结果通知您。

说明

0/200

提交
取消

辅 助

模 式