Question

求几则英文笑话，谢谢啦~~

Answer 1

1.原文：
Father: Shut up! Don't tell your father how to manage our business. I
have eaten more salt than you have rice!
Son: Yes, sir. But no wonder your blood pressure is getting so high.
1.译文：
父亲：闭嘴！不要告诉你老子我该怎麼干，我吃的盐比你吃的米还多！
儿子：遵命。可是怪不得您的血压如今这麼高。

2.原文：
A: Which do you prefer, a window seat or an aisle seat?
B: I always prefer a window seat.
A: Why?
B: In case some bad thing happen I can jump out from it.
2.译文：
甲：在飞机上你喜欢坐靠窗的座位还是靠通道的座位？
乙：我总是喜欢坐靠窗的座位。
甲：为甚麼呢？
乙：万一飞机出事我好从窗子跳出去。

3.原文
Adam and Joseph were talking about their families.
Adam said,"My grandfather was a very good conductor before he died"
"Was he a musician?" joseph asked.
"No,"said Adam,"he was struck by lightning."
3.译文：
亚当和约瑟正在谈及他们的家人。
亚当说：「我祖父在他死前是一个很好的conductor(conductor可作指挥，或导电体解）
约瑟问：「他是不是一个音乐家？」
亚当说：「不是，他是被雷电击中」

不好意思，我只有这几则。

Answer 2

Family problems
Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot. The Indian man said to the American, 'You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven'teven met once.' We call this arranged marriage. I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems.' The American said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story. I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. 'After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and married her, so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law. Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother. More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson. Ultimately, I have become my own grandfather and I am my own grandson.. And you say you have family problems..

Answer 3

一年前的某日，将10元大洋忘在衣服包包里。@捧腹网 现在又穿上这件衣服，摸出那遗失的10元大洋，感动的不得了。以前的我是好人啊！T^T