Question

请英文好的朋友帮我修改一下我的英文作文，建设我是一个学校报社编辑，写一封信建议保留传统纸张报纸。

Dear chancellor:

I think keep the hard-copy version is very necessary. Actually once we did a survey about hard-copy newspaper. A lot of our readers perfer reading paper newspaper to online newspaper. They think paper newspaper is light, and easy to bring. They could use any pose they like to read the newspaper. Though they could also use online newspaper on mobile anytime and anywhere. But they always complaint if look at the small screen for a long time. The eyes will easy to feel tired.

I know the cost part is the key problem. So I have some idea to solve that problem.
1. We could change the color print to the black and write print.
2. We could use the recycled paper which is more cheaper to replace the normal paper.
3. We could find some sponsors whose customer target is march our reader and put their advertisement on our newspaper.

This is my opining about to keep the hard-copy newspaper. Please think about it. Thank you.

Regard.

Name

Answer 1

首先在信的开头做一下自我介绍并交代一下写信目的会比较好吧？

然后再表达自己的看法~

1. 把keep改成keeping

2. 因为这个survey里也提到online newspaper了吧 所以可以直接说Actually once we did a survey and a lot of our readers prefer reading paper newspaper to online newspaper.

3. 把easy to bring改成easy to carry

4. 把两处的could都改成can

5. though和but不能同时出现哦，保留一个就好了，中间用逗号连接

6. 把they could also use online newspaper on mobile改成they can also read e-newspaper on smartphones

7. complaint是名字，这里应该用complain

8. 把if look at the small screen for  a long time. The eyes will easy to feel tired.改成if focusing on the small screen for a long time, the eyes will easily feel tired.

9. 把I know the cost part is the key problem. So I have some idea to solve that problem.改成I know the cost is a key problem and here are some of my suggestions.

10. 把color print, black and white print, recycled paper和normal paper前面的the都去掉

11. 把We could find some sponsors whose customer target is march our reader and put their advertisement on our newspaper.改成We could find some sponsors target at our readers as potential customers and print their advertisements on our newspaper.

12. 把最后一句改成These are my opinions on keeping hard-copy newspaper. Hope you can take them into consideration. Thank you.

13. 把Regard改成Regards:)