经典有趣的英文笑话带翻译?
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英语笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。我整理了,欢迎阅读!
:Goes to the cinema
A boy goes to the cinema. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he es out. He buys a second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he es out again and buys a third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he es out a third time and asks for another ticket. The ticket seller says to him, "Why are you buying all these? Are you meeting friends in the cinema all the time?" "No, I;m not doing that." The *** all man says, "But a big woman always stops me at the door and tears my tickets up."
:Johnny is busy now
It was half-past eight in the morning. The telephone rang and Mary went to answer it.
'Hello, who's that?' she asked.
'It's me--Peter.'
Peter was a friend of Mary's eight-year-old brother, Johnny.
'Oh, hello, Peter. What do you want?' said Mary.
'Can I speak to Johnny?'
'No,' said Mary, 'you can't speak to him now. He is busy. He is getting ready for school. He is eating his breakfast. Grandmother is bing his hair. Sister is under the table, putting his shoes on. Mother is getting his books and putting them in his school bag. Goodbye, I'vegot to go now. I have to hold the door open. The school bus is ing.'
:The result of laziness
懒惰的结果
Mother: Why were you kept after school today, Johnny? Johnny: Teacher told us to write an essay on "The Result of Laziness", and I turned in a blank sheet of paper. 妈妈:约翰尼,你今天放学以后为什么被留下了? 约翰尼:老师叫我们写一篇题为《懒惰的结果》的作文,我交了一张白卷。
:Is ink so expensive
墨水很贵吗
Son: Is ink so very expensive, father? Father: Why, son, what makes you think so? Son: W...well. Mother seems quite disturbed because I spilled some on the carpet. 儿子:爸爸,墨水很贵吗? 父亲:不贵呀,你为什么这么想? 儿子:哦,我把墨水洒了一点在地毯上,妈妈好象挺着急的。
:A school report
学校成绩单
The father was reading the school report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His brow was wrathful***愤怒的*** as he read,
"English, poor. French, weak. mathematics, fair." and he gave a glance of disgust at the quaking lad***少年,小伙子***.
"Well, Dad." said the son, "It is not as good as it might be, but have you seen that?" And hepointed to the next line which read, "health, excellent."
父亲在看他那满怀希望的儿子带回来的学校成绩单。他边看边露出愤怒的表情:
“英语,差;法语,差;数学,中。”他厌恶地瞥了在发抖的儿子一眼。
“爸爸,”儿子说,“可能成绩不够理想。但您看到那一项了吗?”他指了指下一行:“健康状况,优。”
:Goes to the cinema
A boy goes to the cinema. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he es out. He buys a second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he es out again and buys a third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he es out a third time and asks for another ticket. The ticket seller says to him, "Why are you buying all these? Are you meeting friends in the cinema all the time?" "No, I;m not doing that." The *** all man says, "But a big woman always stops me at the door and tears my tickets up."
:Johnny is busy now
It was half-past eight in the morning. The telephone rang and Mary went to answer it.
'Hello, who's that?' she asked.
'It's me--Peter.'
Peter was a friend of Mary's eight-year-old brother, Johnny.
'Oh, hello, Peter. What do you want?' said Mary.
'Can I speak to Johnny?'
'No,' said Mary, 'you can't speak to him now. He is busy. He is getting ready for school. He is eating his breakfast. Grandmother is bing his hair. Sister is under the table, putting his shoes on. Mother is getting his books and putting them in his school bag. Goodbye, I'vegot to go now. I have to hold the door open. The school bus is ing.'
:The result of laziness
懒惰的结果
Mother: Why were you kept after school today, Johnny? Johnny: Teacher told us to write an essay on "The Result of Laziness", and I turned in a blank sheet of paper. 妈妈:约翰尼,你今天放学以后为什么被留下了? 约翰尼:老师叫我们写一篇题为《懒惰的结果》的作文,我交了一张白卷。
:Is ink so expensive
墨水很贵吗
Son: Is ink so very expensive, father? Father: Why, son, what makes you think so? Son: W...well. Mother seems quite disturbed because I spilled some on the carpet. 儿子:爸爸,墨水很贵吗? 父亲:不贵呀,你为什么这么想? 儿子:哦,我把墨水洒了一点在地毯上,妈妈好象挺着急的。
:A school report
学校成绩单
The father was reading the school report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His brow was wrathful***愤怒的*** as he read,
"English, poor. French, weak. mathematics, fair." and he gave a glance of disgust at the quaking lad***少年,小伙子***.
"Well, Dad." said the son, "It is not as good as it might be, but have you seen that?" And hepointed to the next line which read, "health, excellent."
父亲在看他那满怀希望的儿子带回来的学校成绩单。他边看边露出愤怒的表情:
“英语,差;法语,差;数学,中。”他厌恶地瞥了在发抖的儿子一眼。
“爸爸,”儿子说,“可能成绩不够理想。但您看到那一项了吗?”他指了指下一行:“健康状况,优。”
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