Question

跪求高手批改雅思作文~~~最好能给出分数~（2）

题目是：请家教是否好，分析优缺点。
There is a growing tendency nowadays for some concern parents to pay money on private lessons for the sake of their children’s success, other people propose that extra courses will not surely do good to students’ development. Personally, I think the two arguments are both reasonable, but I prefer to agree with the former, for the following reasons.
Admittedly, extra lessons could have some disadvantages as follows. In the first place, as the expensive expends of private lessons, to invite some teachers for special conduction would cost a large amount of money, which would become a the financial burden of some comparatively poor families. Secondly, extra teaching may take up most of the children’s spare time and would probable cause the more intensive studying pressure for them. In a word, the practice would lead some unfavorable outcomes.
Despite the drawbacks, extra tuitions after class do have some positive effects on students’ improvement. First, under the conduction of individual tuition, one can ask questions at any time and he could have more comprehensive understanding on his courses. Thus, the teaching could be more effective and efficient because the private teachers focus only one student. Moreover, the educational schedule could be more adapted to one’s pace, while in the classroom with a large number of students, it is not possible for teachers to have the pace to suit everyone. Last but not least, private teachers have high quality would not only concentrate on the individual’s academic performances, but also the advancement of one’s mental health. Thus, it is advisable for parents to call for private education.
To sum up, although the extra private lessons would bring some unwelcomed things, it is quite importance for individual to receive private educations. Thus, the benefits of the practice outweight the disadvantages.

Answer 1

6.5