A Letter to My Son
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You’re only three years old
and at this point in your life you can't read
much less understand what I’m going to try to tell you in this letter. But I've been thinking a lot about the life that you have ahead of you
about my life so far as I reflect on what I've learned
and about my role as a dad in trying to prepare you for the trials that you will face in the ing years.
You won't be able to understand this letter today
but someday
when you're ready
I hope you will find some wisdom and value in what I share with you.
You are young
and life has yet to take its toll on you
to throw disappointments and heartaches and loneliness and struggles and pain into your path. You have not been worn down yet by long hours of thankless work
by the slings and arrows of everyday life.
For this
be thankful. You are at a wonderful stage of life. You have many wonderful stages of life still to e
but they are not without their costs and perils.
I hope to help you along your path by sharing some of the best of what I've learned. As with any advice
take it with a grain of salt. What works for me might not work for you.
Life Can Be Cruel
There will be people in your life who won't be very nice. They'll tease you because you're different
or for no good reason. They might try to bully you or hurt you.
There's not much you can do about these people except to learn to deal with them
and learn to choose friends who are kind to you
who actually care about you
who make you feel good about yourself. When you find friends like this
hold on to them
treasure them
spend time with them
be kind to them
love them.
There will be times when you are met with disappointment instead of success. Life won't always turn out the way you want. This is just another thing you'll have to learn to deal with. But instead of letting these things get you down
push on. Accept disappointment and learn to persevere
to pursue your dreams despite pitfalls. Learn to turn negatives into positives
and you'll do much better in life.
You will also face heartbreak and abandonment by those you love. I hope you don't have to face this too much
but it happens. Again
not much you can do but to heal
and to move on with your life. Let these pains bee stepping stones to better things in life
and learn to use them to make you stronger.
But Be Open to life Anyway
Yes
you'll find cruelty and suffering in your journey through life … but don't let that close you to new things. Don't retreat from life
don't hide or wall yourself off. Be open to new things
new experiences
new people.
You might get your heart broken 10 times
but find the most wonderful woman the 11th time. If you shut yourself off from love
you'll miss out on that woman
and the happiest times of your life.
You might get teased and bullied and hurt by people you meet … and then after meeting dozens of jerks
find a true friend. If you close yourself off to new people
and don't open your heart to them
you'll avoid pain … but also lose out on meeting some incredible people
who will be there during the toughest times of your life and create some of the best times of your life.
You will fail many times but if you allow that to stop you from trying
you will miss out on the amazing feeling of success once you reach new heights with your acplishments. Failure is a stepping stone to success.
Life Isn't a Competition
You will meet many people who will try to outdo you
in school
in college
at work. They'll try to have nicer cars
bigger houses
nicer clothes
cooler gadgets. To them
life is a petition — they have to do better than their peers to be happy.
Here's a secret: Life isn't a petition. It's a journey. If you spend that journey always trying to impress others
to outdo others
you’re wasting your journey. Instead
learn to enjoy the journey. Make it a journey of Happiness
of constant learning
of continual improvement
of love.
Don't worry about having a nicer car or house or anything material
or even a better-paying job. None of that matters a whit
and none of it will make you happier. You'll acquire these things and then only want more. Instead
learn to be satisfied with having enough — and then use the time you would have wasted trying to earn money to buy those things … use that time doing things you love.
Find your passion
and pursue it doggedly. Don't settle for a job that pays the bills. Life is too short to waste on a job you hate.
Love Should Be Your Rule
If there's a single word you should live your life by
it should be this: Love. It might sound corny
I know … but trust me
there's no better rule in life.
Some would live by the rule of success. Their lives will be stressful
unhappy and shallow.
Others would live by the rule of selfishness — putting their needs above those of others. They will live lonely lives
and will also be unhappy.
Still others will live by the rule of righteousness — trying to show the right path
and admonishing anyone who doesn't live by that path. They are concerned with others
but in a negative way
and in the end will only have their own righteousness to live with
and that's a horrible panion.
Live your life by the rule of love. Love your spouse
your children
your parents
your friends
with all of your heart. Give to them what they need
and show them not cruelty nor disapproval nor coldness nor disappointment
but only love. Open your soul to them.
Love not only your loved ones
but your neighbors … your coworkers … strangers … your brothers and sisters in humanity. Offer anyone you meet a *** ile
a kind word
a kind gesture
a helping hand.
Love not only neighbors and strangers … but your enemy. The person who is cruelest to you
who has been unkind to you … love him. He is a tortured soul
and most in need of your love.
And most of all
love yourself. While others may criticize you
learn not to be so hard on yourself
to think that you’re ugly or dumb or unworthy of love … but to think instead that you are a wonderful human being
worthy of Happiness and love … and learn to love yourself for who you are.
Finally
know that I love you and always will. You are starting out on a weird
scary
daunting
but ultimately incredibly wonderful journey
and I will be there for you when I can. Godspeed.
Love
Your Dad
and at this point in your life you can't read
much less understand what I’m going to try to tell you in this letter. But I've been thinking a lot about the life that you have ahead of you
about my life so far as I reflect on what I've learned
and about my role as a dad in trying to prepare you for the trials that you will face in the ing years.
You won't be able to understand this letter today
but someday
when you're ready
I hope you will find some wisdom and value in what I share with you.
You are young
and life has yet to take its toll on you
to throw disappointments and heartaches and loneliness and struggles and pain into your path. You have not been worn down yet by long hours of thankless work
by the slings and arrows of everyday life.
For this
be thankful. You are at a wonderful stage of life. You have many wonderful stages of life still to e
but they are not without their costs and perils.
I hope to help you along your path by sharing some of the best of what I've learned. As with any advice
take it with a grain of salt. What works for me might not work for you.
Life Can Be Cruel
There will be people in your life who won't be very nice. They'll tease you because you're different
or for no good reason. They might try to bully you or hurt you.
There's not much you can do about these people except to learn to deal with them
and learn to choose friends who are kind to you
who actually care about you
who make you feel good about yourself. When you find friends like this
hold on to them
treasure them
spend time with them
be kind to them
love them.
There will be times when you are met with disappointment instead of success. Life won't always turn out the way you want. This is just another thing you'll have to learn to deal with. But instead of letting these things get you down
push on. Accept disappointment and learn to persevere
to pursue your dreams despite pitfalls. Learn to turn negatives into positives
and you'll do much better in life.
You will also face heartbreak and abandonment by those you love. I hope you don't have to face this too much
but it happens. Again
not much you can do but to heal
and to move on with your life. Let these pains bee stepping stones to better things in life
and learn to use them to make you stronger.
But Be Open to life Anyway
Yes
you'll find cruelty and suffering in your journey through life … but don't let that close you to new things. Don't retreat from life
don't hide or wall yourself off. Be open to new things
new experiences
new people.
You might get your heart broken 10 times
but find the most wonderful woman the 11th time. If you shut yourself off from love
you'll miss out on that woman
and the happiest times of your life.
You might get teased and bullied and hurt by people you meet … and then after meeting dozens of jerks
find a true friend. If you close yourself off to new people
and don't open your heart to them
you'll avoid pain … but also lose out on meeting some incredible people
who will be there during the toughest times of your life and create some of the best times of your life.
You will fail many times but if you allow that to stop you from trying
you will miss out on the amazing feeling of success once you reach new heights with your acplishments. Failure is a stepping stone to success.
Life Isn't a Competition
You will meet many people who will try to outdo you
in school
in college
at work. They'll try to have nicer cars
bigger houses
nicer clothes
cooler gadgets. To them
life is a petition — they have to do better than their peers to be happy.
Here's a secret: Life isn't a petition. It's a journey. If you spend that journey always trying to impress others
to outdo others
you’re wasting your journey. Instead
learn to enjoy the journey. Make it a journey of Happiness
of constant learning
of continual improvement
of love.
Don't worry about having a nicer car or house or anything material
or even a better-paying job. None of that matters a whit
and none of it will make you happier. You'll acquire these things and then only want more. Instead
learn to be satisfied with having enough — and then use the time you would have wasted trying to earn money to buy those things … use that time doing things you love.
Find your passion
and pursue it doggedly. Don't settle for a job that pays the bills. Life is too short to waste on a job you hate.
Love Should Be Your Rule
If there's a single word you should live your life by
it should be this: Love. It might sound corny
I know … but trust me
there's no better rule in life.
Some would live by the rule of success. Their lives will be stressful
unhappy and shallow.
Others would live by the rule of selfishness — putting their needs above those of others. They will live lonely lives
and will also be unhappy.
Still others will live by the rule of righteousness — trying to show the right path
and admonishing anyone who doesn't live by that path. They are concerned with others
but in a negative way
and in the end will only have their own righteousness to live with
and that's a horrible panion.
Live your life by the rule of love. Love your spouse
your children
your parents
your friends
with all of your heart. Give to them what they need
and show them not cruelty nor disapproval nor coldness nor disappointment
but only love. Open your soul to them.
Love not only your loved ones
but your neighbors … your coworkers … strangers … your brothers and sisters in humanity. Offer anyone you meet a *** ile
a kind word
a kind gesture
a helping hand.
Love not only neighbors and strangers … but your enemy. The person who is cruelest to you
who has been unkind to you … love him. He is a tortured soul
and most in need of your love.
And most of all
love yourself. While others may criticize you
learn not to be so hard on yourself
to think that you’re ugly or dumb or unworthy of love … but to think instead that you are a wonderful human being
worthy of Happiness and love … and learn to love yourself for who you are.
Finally
know that I love you and always will. You are starting out on a weird
scary
daunting
but ultimately incredibly wonderful journey
and I will be there for you when I can. Godspeed.
Love
Your Dad
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