请高人帮忙修改英语作文

题目:一些学生进入大学后就放松了学习,然而学习是没有止境的,论证上述观点ThereisnoendtolearningWiththeexpansionofcollegead... 题目:一些学生进入大学后就放松了学习,然而学习是没有止境的,论证上述观点
There is no end to learning
With the expansion of college admission,a growing number lf college students went into college.At the same time,a phenomenon that students in college are gradually stop learning arouse widely public attention.Certainly,their behavioris badly wrong.
For ine thing,although we havr come to college,our status are still students.We should learn more knowlege to prepare for our future job hunting. For another,as an old saying goes,it's never too late to learn.Even if we do have a job,there are still so many things we should learn.Only with a wealth of knowlege,can our speak be more effective .Last but not least,it's no wonder that those who have more knowlege and ability are more likely to be admired by others.Because knowlege build a bridge between those who are in same majors,thus with more knoalege,good relationship could be developed .
Providing the reasons above,I hold the belief that students in campus couldi't waste their study
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cosacaro
2010-12-10 · TA获得超过263个赞
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不是高人略读了一遍~

第二段开头 for one thing。 然后although we have came。
最后一段could not。然后waste their study是不是加个time.
ps. 如果是Essay的话缩写最好都变回去it's--it is. 以及所有标点后都需空一格
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立花響
2010-12-11 · TA获得超过3065个赞
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we是We
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光影
2010-12-11 · TA获得超过2639个赞
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1、行1,if改of,楼主笔误。
2、For ine thing不知楼主要表述什么意思,ine改one。另,后面have拼写的笔误。
3、Only with a wealth of knowlege,can our speak be more effective.中的“,”觉得应当去掉,整个组成一个完整的倒装句,加了逗号,前句和后句就都不通了(均缺少句子成分)。
4、最后一句中的couldn't用cannot/can't,此处可以不用委婉语气,个人认为改shouldn't较好。
5、knowlege拼写错误,少d。
6、ability改为abilities,作为才能使用,是cn.。
7、between指两者之间,文章中显然不是特指两者,改为among。
8、those who are in same majors中的majors去掉“s”。

总的来说,楼主的水平不错了,内容框架、句型句式、修饰词、承接词、语法都很不错。这个文章题目是IELTS还是托福的考试,感觉题目给的很泛。我也只能给点我的观点建议,楼主鉴定,改的不到的地方见谅。

By 玛丽的魔术团队 Moyinis
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