Question

有哪些英语笑话，要简短，适合五年级学生。

Answer 1

　　Violin Lessons
　　"Daddy, can I learn to play the violin?" young Sarah asked her father. She was always asking for things and her father was not very pleased.
　　"You cost me a lot of money, Sarah," he said. "First you wanted to learn horse riding, then dancing, then swimming. Now it's the violin.
　　"I'll play every day, Daddy." Sarah said. "I'll try very hard.
　　"All right," her father said. "This is what I'll do. I'll pay for you to have lessons for six weeks. At the end of six weeks you must play something for me. If you play well, you can have more lessons. If you play badly, I will stop the lessons."
　　"0. K. Daddy," Sarah said. "That is fair.
　　He soon found a good violin teacher and Sarah began her lessons. The teacher was very expensive, but her father kept his promise.
　　The six weeks passed quickly. The time came for Sarah to play for her father.
　　She went to the living room and said, "I'm ready to play for you, Daddy.
　　"Fine, Sarah," her father said. "Begin.
　　She began to play. She played very badly. She made a terrible noise.
　　Her father had one of his friends with him, and the friend put his hands over his ears.
　　When Sarah finished, her father said, "Well done, Sarah. You can have more lessons."
　　Sarah ran happily out of the room. Her father's friend turned to him. "You've spent a lot of money, but she still plays very badly. he said.
　　"Well, that's true," her father said. "But since she started learning the violin I've been able to buy five apartments in this build very cheaply. In another six weeks I'll own the whole building!"

　　小提琴课
　　“爸爸，我能学拉小提琴吗？”小莎拉问她的父亲。她总是要东西，因此她爸爸很不高兴。
　　“你花了我很多钱，莎拉，”他说，“开始你想学骑马，然后想学跳舞，然后是游泳。现在又想学拉小提琴。”
　　“我会每天都拉的，爸爸，”莎拉说，“我会认真练的。”
　　“好吧，”她爸爸说。“下面是我要做的：我会为你付六个星期的小提琴课的钱，六个星期后你必须拉首曲子给我听。如果你拉得很好，你可以继续上小提琴课，要是你拉得很差，你就不要再学了。”
　　“行。爸爸，”莎拉说，“这很公平。”
　　他很快就找到了一个好的小提琴老师，莎拉就开始学拉提琴了。尽管学费很高，但她爸爸遵守了诺言。
　　六个星期很快就过去了。该莎拉拉提琴给爸爸听了。
　　她走进起居室说：“我准备好拉提琴给你听了。”
　　“好哇，莎拉，”她爸爸说。“开始吧。”
　　她开始拉了。她拉得很差，发出了可怕的嗓音。她爸爸身旁有位朋友，朋友用手捂着耳朵。
　　莎拉拉完一曲，她父亲说：“拉得好，莎拉。你可以继续学琴了。”
　　莎拉高兴地跑出门去。她父亲的朋友对他说：“你已经花了不少钱了，但她还是拉得很差。”
　　“噢，的确如此，”她爸爸说，“但自从她开始学小提琴，我就可以很便宜地买下这幢楼的五个公寓。再过六周，我就可以拥有整幢楼啦！”
　　希望采纳！

Answer 2

你是要纯英语的？还是中文里掺着英语的？

Answer 3

两个美国佬吵架
A:why?
B:no why!
A:why no why?
B:no why no why!
A:why no why no why?
B:no why no why no why!
A:why no why no why no why?
.....
A：为什么？
B：不为什么！
答：为什么没有，为什么？
B：没有，为什么没有为什么！
答：为什么没有，为什么没有为什么？
B：没有，为什么没有，为什么没有为什么！
答：为什么没有，为什么没有，为什么没有，为什么？

这是一个有效果的

Answer 4

teacher：Ailce，why are you late for school every morning？
Ailce:every time l come the cornce,a guidepost says"School---Go Slow"