Question

谢谢！！急求！！请帮忙英语翻译一下！！

赵：抹布，（巩汉林：en？），软和、吸水，这要是擦起桌子来
巩：：嘿嘿嘿，哎呦，先别着急干活哎，让老太太开开眼~
金：走————（音乐声起）
巩：瞧瞧瞧瞧
赵：哎呀，（巩汉林：en），这闺女真俊nei
巩：漂亮吧
赵：这旗袍也好（巩汉林：ai——）
赵：haihaihaihai（笑声------流行前线注），这抹布太小了，来，换我这个
巩汉林：人家那是手绢儿。。。（赵丽蓉：haihai）
巩：一会呀也让您穿上工作服
赵：我、我、我，我也穿这个？
巩：en，你跟她们的不一样
赵：我说着呢，你要穿上这个就没法干活
巩：对对，带老太太试衣裳~~
赵：上哪试？
巩：后面去，heihei（笑声------流行前线注）（几乎同时）金珠：您这边请~
巩：eiyou，老太太。。。接电话（对金珠说）
金：wai，你好，我们是太后大酒楼（巩汉林：对，告诉他，我们改太后大酒楼了）
金：是物价局的！
巩：什么事啊？
金：让报菜价
巩：就说我不在~！
金：哎，我们经理说他不在
（巩汉林劈手夺过电话）
巩：连撒谎你都不会撒
巩：喂，我不在，啊不不不不不，他不在，呵呵呵，我是他女秘书
巩：您放心，我们菜价定的是公平合理、物美价廉，他回来一定给您去电话
巩：好，再见，拜拜。Henghenghenghenghenghengheng——（笑声------流行前线注）
巩：再来电话谁也不许接
金：ai！
巩：看后边准备怎么着了
金：衣服穿好了么！
赵：穿好了————
金：请————
（音乐声起）
巩：我看看我看看，eiyou，嘿嘿嘿嘿，好啊
巩：en、en、en、en，真漂亮
巩：haiyao，您别抖搂这抹布哎
赵：我在这拿它代替手绢呢（nei）
巩：老人家快请坐快请坐————
巩：aiyou，真是没想到啊，您穿上这身衣裳，简直就是那慈禧再世~~
赵：ei，谁谁谁谁谁谁？
巩：慈禧。。。
赵：慈禧？
巩：en
赵：就是一顿饭吃200多道菜的那个皇太后ou？
巩：喳！
赵：不行不行不行。。。

Answer 1

:Dish cloth, (the wood of 巩汉 :En?), Soft with,absorb water, this if wipe to rise table
巩 ::The Hey Hey Hey, ah, don't become nervous stem to live ah first, let the old woman open~
Gold:Walk-(Music voice rise)
巩 :Lo lo lo lo
:Oh, (the wood of 巩汉 :En), this virgin true 俊 nei
巩 :Beautiful
:This chirpaur is all right(the wood of 巩汉 :Ai-)
:Haihaihaihai(laughter-Spread to note front), this dish cloth was too small, come, changing me this
The wood of 巩汉 :Somebody else that is the handkerchief son...(ZHAO4 LI2 RONG2:Haihai)
巩 :A short while ah also let you put on smock
:I,Is,I, do I also wear this?
巩 :En, you and their different
:Do I say, your having to put on this can not do to live
巩 :To to, take an old woman to try clothes~~
:Ascend which to try?
巩 :The behind go to, heihei(laughter-Spread to note front)(almost in the meantime)the gold bead:you please~
巩 :Eiyou, old woman...Answer the phone(say to the gold bead)
Gold:Wai, How are you, we are queen mothers big wine shop(the wood of 巩汉 :To, tell him, we changed big wine shop of queen mother)
Gold:BE the commodity price bureau!
巩 :What matter?
Gold:Let the report vegetables price
巩 :Say me not at~!
Gold:Ah, our manager says him not at
(The wood of 巩汉 is in a flash of hand the 夺 conduct electricity words)
巩 :Connect to tell a lie you to know nothing about 撒
巩 :Feed, I ain't at,Not not not not not, he not at, the 呵呵呵 , I am his female secretary
巩 :You trust, what our vegetables price settle is fair reasonable,of good quality but inexpensive, he come back certainly give you go to telephone
巩 :Good, see again, religious festival.Henghenghenghenghenghengheng-(laughter-Spread to note front)
巩 :Telephone again words who also forbid to connect
Gold:Ai!
巩 :See how the back preparation wear
Gold:The clothes wore to like 么 !
:Wear-
Gold:Please-
(Music voice rise)
巩 :I see me to see, eiyou,The Hey Hey Hey Hey, good
巩 :En,en,en,en, true beautiful
巩 :Haiyao, you don't tremble to hug this dish cloth ah
:Do I take it to replace handkerchief here(nei)
巩 :Old man's house Please sit down quick please sit down quickly-
巩 :Aiyou is really unexpectedly, you put on this body clothes, be that 慈禧 simply a life time again~~
:Ei,Who who who who who who?
巩 :慈禧 ...
:慈禧 ?
巩 :en
:Be that empress dowager ou that the at one feed rice eats more than 200 vegetableses?
巩 :喳 !
:Don't go and don't go and don't go...